IT'S MY WAY OR THE HIGHWAY! (kidding folks, please still read my blog :P)

2007-09-18T02:10:00.000+08:00

MOVED TO: http://melpower.livejournal.com

2007-09-12T15:10:00.000+08:00

How lucky I am to have something that makes saying goodbye so hard. ~From the movie Annie

Relaxed

2007-08-31T19:50:00.000+08:00

I did a full yoga workout today following the instructional video my parents bought (but didn't use). It looks so simple but I was soaked in perspiration by the end of it! But OHHHH if felt SO GOOD. Seriously, it was like as I stretched my body, especially my back or my chest, all the tight muscles loosened and the tension was released. As I focused on my breathing and balance and pushing my limits, all my troubles around melted away, which was just perfect given all I've been going through lately. ................................................................................................................................................................................................................................. I felt really accomplished even though I was dripping with sweat by the end of it. ................................................................................................................................................................................................................................. The last exercise was to lie down for 20 minutes and relax and focus on deep breathing through your nose. I put on a soft and gentle flute soundtrack and lay under my tent in my room on a mat, focusing on my breathing and thinking happy thoughts. I realised how improperly I breathe normally, fast and shallow breathing, or irregular breaths, all through my mouth. I thought of myself in Bristol, my beautifully furnished new room, doing the same thing when I get too stressed by schoolwork or get too sad from homesickness. The only thing that seemed to be missing was the sound of the waves crashing against the shore that never fails to make me at peace with the world and smile again.. ................................................................................................................................................................................................................................. :) I just thought of a good idea! I should go get that CD with the nature soundtrack, of the ocean, or rain, or different types! :) But I'm quite broke now cause I've to save up for my daddy's birthday present (it's coming in 4 days time) If anyone buys it for me, I'll give the person 3171879324 hugs :D

2007-08-28T09:40:00.000+08:00

MY blog is SO screwed up. Template sucks, tagboard's all the way at the bottom of the page (don't ask me why I have NO idea), there's no rich text editor for me to change font or font size, and I can't seem to paragraph! OKAY. I'm gonna shift blog soon. I just started up a private blog and i've been blogging there so that explains the lack of updates over here. I'd like to clarify. I'm off to Bristol on the 28th of SEPTEMBER, not AUGUST, i've had people smsing me today much to my amusement! Some bad stuff have been happening to me lately, things with my family, and rizki. But with faith, everything good will be restored. (with exception of this blog's html, I have given up and am simply gonna switch to a new host soon!)

Tell me about it

2007-08-10T17:20:00.000+08:00

NOW my parents are worried I'm gonna be having too much fun to study :P

Bittersweet

2007-08-09T14:05:00.001+08:00

Bittersweet week............................................................................................................................................................................................ Sweet: Elits met up at KAP and chatted like old times (: ........................................................................................................................................................................................... Bitter: Maybe the last day spent with Tran for the next 6 years ............................................................................................................................................................................................ Sweet: Our thoughtful talk for hours at Vivo's outdoor wooden planks, and our very crazy dinner at Asian Kitchen where we laughed almost nonstop, then our rather emo parting. ........................................................................................................................................................................................... Sweet: Spending even more time with Mav and Xh. ........................................................................................................................................................................................... Bitter: Stomach problems. .......................................................................................................................................................................................... Sweet: My family watching "Family fear factor" together and supporting the same family. ........................................................................................................................................................................................... Bitter: The dull homesick-ish ache I get whenever I think of 28th Sept, despite how much excitement I have for that day as well. ........................................................................................................................................................................................... Sweet: The 4 hours that just flew by sitting with Xh at the beach talking. ........................................................................................................................................................................................... Bitter: My whole family missing my mom alot and realizing she's only been overseas for 4 days when it's felt like 2 weeks already! ........................................................................................................................................................................................... Sweet: Alice, the indian lady on the train I made friends with cuz I offered her help. ........................................................................................................................................................................................... Bitter: Going through the pain of the food poisoning. It was so bad at one point my whole body started shaking and I blacked out. =/. .......................................................................................................................................................................................... Sweet: Mave giving me her timetable. I'm going to collect Xh, Nani and Sq's as well so I can ask them out at the right time or webcam with them at the right time =). .......................................................................................................................................................................................... Bitter: Receiving the whole pack of instructions from British Council late (due to my late application) and realizing I had to struggle through all that procedures due to the lack of instructions. ........................................................................................................................................................................................... Sweet: Me and Tis laughing and laughing at my dad's always unrealistic plans for the new house. She actually laughed until tears started streaming out of her eyes!. .......................................................................................................................................................................................... Bitter: Missing rizki and feeling sad that he got mad at me for not going to the doctor for food poisoning. ........................................................................................................................................................................................... Sweet: Touched that he cares so much and it shows how much he loves me............................................................................................................................................................................................ Sweet: Happy Birthday Singapore! I'm in a patriotic mood and wearing red and white now (:. .......................................................................................................................................................................................... Bitter: Goodbye to Singapore in 51 days... :'( It's a love-hate relationship. ........................................................................................................................................................................................... Sweet: Looking at all the pictures of my birthday celebrations this year. ........................................................................................................................................................................................... Bitter: Knowing my 19th birthday was my last birthday spent in Singapore for a long long time...

More coherence please mel.

2007-07-31T01:24:00.000+08:00

I LOVE GUOHOU AND JOHN. I was having such a bad day until I met them yesterday, they really made my day (: I was trying to test out if guys are really that bad at multitasking, so I kept talking to them during the movie. =) .................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................... John IS really bad, cuz he seemed to get all confused whenever I turned to talk to him. .................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................... Guohou on the other hand, is pretty good at multitasking! He even adds in his own comments and cracks now and then. (: .................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................... AND GUESS WHAT? We 3 were ALL wearing shirts with horizontal stripes across! How cool was that? But, as you know, guys aren't fans of taking photos, and to remain cool enough to hang out with them, I resisted suggesting for us to take one. HAHAHA. .................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................... We saw an advert about Ratatouiee (however you spell that) and we were all like "Oohhh.. so THAT'S what happened to our GP tutor after he stopped giving us tuition." (Remy, is the name of the RAT.).................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................... They're nice although in a sexist way. They refused to believe I know my way to Bras Basah (ofcourse I know my way, my direction sense is impeccable :P) and so insisted on going there with me even though they had to rush back home to pack their stuff for book-in. So, do I have a point? Yes I have my point. Even though they are lousypokers for thinking my direction sense is bad, I am still very touched by their care and concern! Aww, this is a Barney-hug moment..................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................... And much much later did I realised I forgot to pay Guohou for my ticket! IT WAS SUCH A HORRIFYING EXPERIENCE cuz I can't stand owing people money aside from Riz cuz it's comfortable owing each other money in our case. So I called right away and he told me not to trouble myself to come to AMK when it's not on the NEL, and I still sounded kinda panicky, going "What if, what if the next we meet is quite long away?" And he went "Then just pay me in pounds." HAHAHA. Niceee. .................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................... And saturday night was supposed to be a catch-up-with-guohou time but my dad hogged him for 1 hour! ): HAHAHA. Okay, actually guohou was asking my dad for advice on accountancy since my dad did his major in that. Which led to them talking about alot of other industries like tourism, F&B etc. But I still got to hear lots of stories of his bunk pple and patrol duty and ghost stories, and got to tell him about me too! (: .................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................... GUESS WHAT HAPPENED. So, after Guohou thanks my dad and says he has to leave, we hang out at my garden for like half an hour talking, then after that, we say bye and I go into the house and press the switch that auto-closes the gate. 2 minutes later, as I'm entering Tis's room, thanking my dad again for helping GH out, I get a phone call from GH. "Uh.. do you mind opening the gate again? I'm still in your house!!" And I was like "Oh my god I'm sorry I'll go open the gate now!" and Tis was like "Oh my god he's TRAPPED there??" It was damned hilarious. I always feared I would accidentally do that to my piano,tuition,violin teachers in the past, but NOOO, the first person I had to do that to was GH. Lucky him! .................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................... I REALLY HOPE THAT GH AND JOHN GET THEIR FIRST CHOICE WHEN THEY REAPPLY NEXT YEAR! I'm gonna pray for them (: .................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................... Ruffles wants me to pass this message to Bloatie: Ruffles hopes that Bloatie is having fun at his new place. It definitely is less dusty. Ruffles knows that Bloatie misses his old friends back at Montreal, but reminds Bloatie that he'll make new friends in his new place. Ruffles also wants to tell Bloatie that although last time him and Bloatie was hung out together almost all the time, now that even though they're having separate lives, Ruffles thinks of Bloatie constantly and hopes Bloatie takes care of himself and has lots of fun and works hard (at being a good bear). Ruffles misses Bloatie. (: .................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................... My bear is so troublesome! Just because he's my favourite bear he thinks he can ask these troublesome favours from me! SIGH. But I did it for him since Bloatie's his best friend and I know how it feels to miss your best friend so much. OKAY. I've had a rather stressful time of flight booking online (it's complicated), VISA worrying and other stuff. But I'm fine, I'll just go get some rest and I'll be all bright and happy tomorrow morning. Or.. afternoon. Whatever. (depends what time I wake up) (: Thanks Chieh for calming me down when I started freaking out over the VISA (my school sent me the letter without all the details I need for the VISA), and thanks Kat for cheering me up with SMILEYFEST/SMILEYPARADE!(: .................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................... Meanwhile on Desperate Housewives, I CAN'T BELIEVE IT'S ALMOST OVER NOOOOO... I love DesperateHousewives!! I love them so much I feel like they're my friends now! And and and... Susan is always so hilarious I want to hug her! Whereas Gaby is so ridiculous I want to slap her! And I am SO disappointed in Lynette and Tom. They are my favourite couple but look what they're doing to their marriage now! SCREWING IT UP! COME ON YOU GUYS, PULL YOUR ACT TOGETHER!! You're supposed to be the role models for all married couples maaan. .................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................... OKAY I AM NOT COHERENT. But at least I'm not full of things to rant about which I did last night and hurt someone quite. I'm really sorry about that.. I'll try to rant it to my journal next time ok? And thank you for letting me rant. You have no idea how much better I felt after that, although I suddenly felt exhausted once I stopped being angry. .................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................... OKAY. Goodnight people. I want to tan but I'm having my period so yucccks. But I should be thankful enough if my cramps actually manage to go away tomorrow. They've been haunting me past 3 days!! Tell me, who cramps for 3 days!! CRAZY CRAMPS. Now I wish I hadn't said all the stuff about wishing my period came more often so I can eat more but not get fat. That was probably said in a moment of mad-happiness and contented moment stuffed full of food like raw fish and pizza. HAHAHA. .................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................... Goodnight(:

A piece of my pie.

2007-07-25T14:31:00.000+08:00

I'm trying to be there for you, whether or not you appreciate that fact since you've been too busy pushing everyone who cares away, only wanting the person who doesn't care to be there for you. ---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Don't say I don't understand.---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- You don't think I've been through that whole load of crap? It's just cuz you weren't there for me during that period of time that you don't understand how bad it got and think it was NOTHING. ---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- How much patience do you think I have, or how much tolerance to resist the urge to argue back and defend, while you moan over your ill-fate and criticize my relationship with the person I love most, hinting things like our connection isn't as strong as what you feel with him, or things like our relationship isn't special or he doesn't mean as much to me as HE means to you? ---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- We all have tough and good spots of periods in our lives, this being my good time doesn't mean I don't care you're having a bad one. FYI, I had a really tough time during the start of my J2 year with alot of shit like bad exam results, relationship problems, hamstring injuries and other injuries that landed me in A&E, and conflicts with my parents. So don't you dare get mad at me just cuz all these are in the past, just cuz I don't seem to care, cuz the more people you push away, the less people you'll be left with. ---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- And guess what? I was hurt when you said I should not mention the subject if I treat you as a "good friend". What's the use of being best friends if crisis strikes and like lightning reduces our friendship to nothing? -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------Perhaps i'm just being pmsy or whatever. My period's been delayed and that makes me even more cranky than ever. Plus the stress over the visa, bank acc and booking flight is getting to me. ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------RAWR RAWR RAWR. ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------Anyway, there's no need to infer from my entry, I like to put things clearly across to people I care about. -----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------That's cuz I don't believe in the saying about people who love you not needing explanations. from you -----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------Why do you think married people quarrel often and some even divorce? Why do parents doubt kids who have deemed themselves trustworthy all the while? Why do friendships weaken after some time of not seeing each other and lack of communication? ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------That's cuz no matter how much we love each other, we are ultimately still VERY DIFFERENT PEOPLE and may not understand why each other is doing things a certain way, or feeling a certain way. ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------If you love somebody, you'd go to all lengths to explain yourself, how you feel so the person can be there with you, your actions, so the person is involved in your plans. You'd take the effort to explain yourself because you know that person truly cares about you and would want to understand you after trying their best and failing to. SO. I think the whole saying abt pple who love you not needing you to explain yourself is absolute bollocks.----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------Case Study #1, My sister: Me and tis have grown up close. We behave the same way, talk the same way, dress the same way, laugh the same way, sound the same way! But that doesn't mean that we think EXACTLY the same way or REACT exactly the same way to the same situation! It just means that chances are higher from our closeness and similar upbringing that we'd react the same way or have the same opinion. But then why would we have hours and hours of what we call "sisterly talk", shooing my mom from the room saying it's only for "sisters" (grins)? It's cuz we still may not understand why the other person feels a certain way abt certain things and that's why we can talk and talk for hours about just how we feel abt some friends, or the way the school is doing things, or family! And I first understood the meaning of the word "love" when upon a certain moment of our childhood together I woke up and realised we'd fallen asleep holding hands cuz we were scared of the dark... ---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------For those still not convinced by this argument above, let me ask you this question then. Do you mean that since there are SOOO many people who don't understand you completely and SOOO few people who never have to ask you "What do you mean?" or "How are you feeling now?" or "How are you?" -which in short, are all EXPLANATIONS for your behaviour or feelings, means that you're loved by like almost nobody in this world? ---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------Case Study #2, My Parents: My parents love me very much, I can feel that in the years of concern, careful upbringing and sacrifices. BUT, they aren't the ones who understand me best. They still need me to be accountable about who I'm going out with, with my money, with my curfew. If I exceed my curfew, I need to explain it to them, but that's cuz they need the reassurance as parents, and the renewed trust and faith, not cuz they don't love me that they keep asking me to explain myself. ---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------If YOU don't bother to explain yourself to people even though they're there to listen and to care, (this doesn't just apply to just one of my friends only), don't start taking it out on others when they don't understand despite TRYING THEIR BEST. Worse of all, don't start resenting them for being happy. IF YOU DON'T BOTHER EXPLAINING YOURSELF TO PEOPLE, and you can't even be bothered to take the EFFORT and TIME to just talk to them to HELP them UNDERSTAND, I don't think YOU ought to be the one accusing others of not loving you. Perhaps you should ask yourself who's the one not showing the love.---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------Case Study #3, Past Experiences: I realised I used to have times when I had that mindset, of not bothering to explain myself to people when I got frustrated. I failed to see they were trying their best to understand me, and instead took them as my punching bag. I also used to think that the person who understood me best WITHOUT ME EXPLAINING is the person best suited to spend the rest of my life in love with, but upon maturing I realised it is the person who TRIES HIS BEST to understand me while I don't mind (in fact I'm happy to) go to lengthy explanations of my sometimes-complicated feelings to help him understand who is the right one for me. ---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------Thus, I conclude it is a fallacious saying. --------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Oh and food for thought. For those who think that ENTERING a relationship is the end of all your troubles, your worries, your cares, please think again. Rizki once told me this, and I absolutely agree. "People always think that marriage is what solves the problems, but actually marriage springs up even more problems to be solved." In-laws, living together, debates over kids upbringing, you think marriage is the sure fire-proof way of ensuring happiness?? ---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------Similarly, you think that being in a relationship means you're ALWAYS happy and that's the end of your miserable days of being rejected/ignored/treated unequally?? You have NO IDEA then, NOT A SINGLE GODAMN CLUE how hard it is to sustain a relationship. Rizki and I have been thru hellloads crap before, it is only thru all these that we've grown stronger by having a positive attitude towards our arguments and fights instead of letting it doom us into non-existence. It is only thru this that we've reached a stable stage of not arguing for a long time already and just talking out our differences calmly and openly and even humorously though seriously. ---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------QUOTE: “Love is saying 'I feel differently' instead of 'You're wrong.'” ---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------YES and stop thinking that people who are attached don't understand how you feel (again this doesn't just apply to ONE friend but MANY), ofcourse it sucks to have it not work out between the one you like and you. Worse still, ofcourse it hurts to have it not work out between the one you love and you. But do you have ANY CRAPPING IDEA AT ALL, how much it fucking hurts to have it not work out with the one you're IN LOVE WITH? Loving someone and being in love are 2 different worlds. And to think of losing the person you're in love with isn't just painful, or undesirable, or sufferable, it's unimaginably excruciating pain. Pain beyond all pain you'll ever feel physically. You lose all your senses and your heart doesn't seem to beat for you anymore, but for the sake of your existence. ---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------Stop thinking that life is being unfair to you by not granting you to be with the one you love. Cuz guess what? Whether you want to admit it or not, LIFE IS WITHIN YOUR CONTROL. You ALWAYS HAVE A CHOICE. i/span> >---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------Jloo told me this when I was younger, a wide-eyed Sec 4, but I have now realised the truth of her words. You always have a choice to make your own decisions, to your own actions, to the friends you make, the relationships you're in and their strength. You can EMPOWER urself, or let yourself rot and curse other factors for doing you in. If things happen that seem BEYOND YOUR CONTROL, they're not. Cuz you still have the choice to be jealous, to be sad, or be angry, to be hurt, or to let go of all the negative emotions within you to be happy. (Which I am doing by posting this) ---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------Ghandi once said this: "Nobody can hurt me unless they have my permission." Yes he died from an enemy's actions, but he was never hurt because that enemy was never his friend to begin withand there was no betrayal in that action. ---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------Mrs oon told me this: "Each and every person is responsible for their feelings", which I scorned at and found ridiculous at first. But this proves that I WAS WRONG and SHE WAS RIGHT AFTERALL. YOUR LIFE IS IN YOUR CONTROL, and this quote is just one of them examples: “When we're incomplete, we're always searching for somebody to complete us. When, after a few years or a few months of a relationship, we find that we're still unfulfilled, we blame our partners and take up with somebody more promising. This can go on and on--series polygamy--until we admit that while a partner can add sweet dimensions to our lives, we, each of us, are responsible for our own fulfillment. Nobody else can provide it for us, and to believe otherwise is to delude ourselves dangerously and to program for eventual failure every relationship we enter.” I'm sure Shuqi would agree with the quote from her message to me a few days ago ;) --------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Okay I'm going shopping with my daddy now! (: And shuqi's sleeping over tonight. =)=)--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Last but not least, here's a quote I gaped at cuz of how true. --------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- “Find a guy who calls you beautiful instead of hot, who calls you back when you hang up on him, who will lie under the stars and listen to your heartbeat, or will stay awake just to watch you sleep... wait for the boy who kisses your forehead, who wants to show you off to the world when you are in sweats, who holds your hand in front of his friends, who thinks you're just as pretty without makeup on. One who is constantly reminding you of how much he cares and how lucky his is to have you.... The one who turns to his friends and says, 'that's her.'”=) I found that guy, I found him. =)

PIG OUT WEEK! (:

2007-07-23T14:01:00.000+08:00

Now that I'm done with Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows, there's nothing to distract me so completely from the small unpleasantries of the afternoon. My rumbly aching tummy as a result of eating too much laksa yesterday, the increasing feeling of screwedness when I think of the new ballet dance, the dish-dash of preparation to be done for going to the fine city of Bristol, and a tad of loneliness wondering how Rizki's trip to JB with his apartment mates is going. -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- I was seized by a sudden urge to remove all my finger and toe nail polish this morning, then to re-read Harry Potter, then to play endless Nickelodeon Spongebob games. I guess my Peter Pan complex has finally overcome me. Throws hands up in surrender and chants "I am four years old." =) -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- The rest of my week is gonna be pretty packed except for today, but I'm guessing I do need a break, judging from my very sudden breakdown (I was damn shocked myself!) yesterday in Thomson Plaza's public toilet, calling Rizki from a cubicle and sobbing over the phone about how freaked out I suddenly felt about going to UK. I felt alot better after that, probably there was all the worries and apprehension built up -that I nudged aside amidst my flurry of activity and plans for the 3 year stay- and the dam unfortunately broke and out poured everything. At least I pulled myself together within 45 minutes with no influence of alcohol or medication which I'm proud of, the only thing which helped me get through that was Ramadhan (: -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- I love you Ramadhan. (: ANYWAY. My weekend was good. Family movie (in which everybody fell asleep except me and tis- how apt given the movie is about sisterhood ;] ) Harry Potter, Cousin gathering celebration of my grandma's 73rd birthday (oops women don't like their age publicized!) Rizki coming over and sharing his HP book with me (Ivan was hogging the family's) -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- My past week's been even better. I spent the whole week with the very cool Ramadhan. =) Monday was hectic yet fulfilling. I went with Rizki from AMK, to Poolside to get Ms Ling's treat aka Horfan. She's not that picky afterall :) Next, to NJ, where we met people we haven't seen for a long long time, ChoonYee, Fadz, Reggie, Mr Tong, and Lauren came out of nowhere and hugged me, gave me a shock that girl! Next, we had our hunt for Ms Ling and finally found her and she bought us both drinks (: Our chat with Mr Tong was, hmmm enlightening, and lunch with ms ling was SUPER FUN. Being an ex-student has its priviledges, teachers tell you alot more stuff than they used to ;) So the rest of our conversation is top secret. =) But one part of it we started talking about how I always got caught in the middle of Ms Ling and Coach last time and they both scolded me and had different instructions, and I got quite stunned for awhile cuz I seriously forgot whatever scoldings Ms Ling gave me. I only remembered smth vaguely about flowers and nothing else. Rizki nodded and said "You took it very well" and I went "Uh.. what did you scold me about?" and Rizki gives a very "I-can't-believe-it" look and Ms Ling bursts out laughing. HAHAHAHA. But I seriously can't remember lol, and Ms Ling had to remind me it was smth about wanting to cancel training for the Vday fundraising prep, and I was like "Oh okay.." But couldn't remember still. -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- OMG WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME! -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Oh yea and I still got a scolding for getting B for math, Ms Ling: "I really expected you to get your A you know!" :( But then she knew I tried my best and probably due to exam stress that I underperformed so she stopped scolding me. Hahaha. -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- At one point of time we were talking about something and I could hear the pride in her voice when she commented about me. She's one of the rare teachers who get to know their students well, and don't value them solely based on achievements, that's all I can say. =) IT WAS JUST SUPER FUN AND WE CAN'T WAIT TO GO BACK AND VISIT HER AGAIN =) -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Next, we went to NUS to settle Rizki's Kentridge Hall payment, and I saw the place. Wow quite nice, but haven't seen his room yet! He put me in charge of helping me decorate his room! --------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------=) :D:D:D I AM SO HAPPY AND HONOURED! YAY!!! YAY!!!!!! I mean, which guy would put his GIRLFRIEND in charge of decorating HIS room may I know? That means he trusts my taste!! =) *beaming really happily now* Starts thinking of pink curtains and bedsheets (hahaha just kidding honey, no pink!) -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- After that, we walked around town and just had so much fun doing nothing really, like random stuff, and then we watched Harry Potter and the Order of Phoenix! I have to commend this movie as good stuff, despite it cutting out alot from the book. We saw some HSBC people yay. But no yana sam margaret et or eugene :( I miss them. -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Tuesday we were slighty bummed cuz of the impending storm, but we cheered up with the hunt for chicken and chips, and we watched Transformers! (It was my 2nd time but i didn't mind cuz it was really good and cuz I knew Rizki would really like it :D) And our chicken hunt was seriously hilarious =) Full of ups and downs. HAHAHA. -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Wednesday was FANTASTIC =)-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Thursday got my slightly cranky. I sent Rizki to his QET test after prepping him with tons of notes the past few days and tutoring him (: I met Ferro! Ok, that's not the cranky part. Cranky part: It started to trickle rain, the pour, then storm, and I was almost drenched, all that saved me was the precious hood on my sweater! Seriously, hoods are so underrated. (: Then I smartly took the bus the wrong direction, took a whole mess of bus/mrt all over and finally got to dhoby ghaut, collected the bank statements from Aunty Jen and then headed to Robinson Road (still starving from no breakfast or lunch but determined to complete my task first), and then there was a whole screwed up 2 hours in Visa Centre and i can't believe the security is so tight! Like I had to switch off my HP once I entered, I was searched and my bag wasn't spared. All this trouble and I still couldn't settle it, and it looks like I can't settle it until dear Uni of Bristol sends me the letter with the real signature! But after all my crankiness, I felt so much better once Rizki came to look for my after his test. His hugs can really take all the crankiness away. --------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------HAHAHA. =) He brought me to Maxwell and we ate and ate and ate. And FINALLY there was raw fish! But rizki didn't really like the fish :( BUT I ate it all up! HAHAHA. We were supposed to go for our Swensens date but then I felt so sleepy that in the end he came over to my house instead! =) And guess what? We ate even more. Pizza, Sausages, Chips... WE ARE CRAZY PIGS LA. Thank you for understanding when I was tired and coming over! It's super fun with you in my house! (: -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Friday we were again bummed out cuz of the rain, but then it was fun walking around with Shuqi and Xiaohui, tagging along on their shopping trip tho Rizki and I aren't shoppaholics! He was trying to help me find my striped long sleeve shirt but couldn't find :( Then while they were in Pull & Bear trying on clothes, we made bets on how long they'd take, then ate chips, then suddenly Rizki went "Wait here.." and he walked a distance away and suddenly beckoned me over. I walked there and GUESS WHAT I SAW? Taka Food Fest! The entire L1 area had been used for setting up food stalls! =) --------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------I WAS SO DAMN HAPPY. HAHAHA. And then I ate like damn alot given I had a heavy Thai Express Lunch. Like, shared a sausage with Ramadhan, Jap biscuit TUNA croissant with Xh, koped Xh's fries. Something maluating happened. HAHAHA. -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Okay. First before anyone tells it to you putting me in a very bad light, I shall say this. Look, EVERYBODY has their moments of embarrassment, so before you judge me on how loser I am, please think back on your own malu moments =) -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Anyway, after that I had dinner with Ramadhan at Swensens which was SUPPOSED to be a romantic thing but apparently someone had a problem with not being a romantic spoiler and we ended up laughing the whole dinner instead SIGH. ): But fine, I doomed some potentially romantic moments as well before, such as this. -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Rizki: Where do you want to eat tonight? (asks me really gently) ------------------------ Me: HAHHHH?? (damn damn loudly to irritate him) -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- *sheepish* Can't think of a proper way to end my entry. HAHAHA.

2007-07-17T11:42:00.000+08:00

As I reflected on what Dory commented a few days ago, that my life's going quite perfect, I realised she was right. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------ I'm on my road to my dreams (I got the opportunity to study law in one of UK's top 5 law schools- Bristol!), I've caring and supportive friends who fill my inbox or give me random calls or buzzes on msn asking my plans, sharing moments of laughter and seriousness depending on occasion, I've the most supportive parents one could ask for, encouraging me to go for my dreams even if it may cost them quite alot, (despite the occasional freaking out and saying they don't want me to go hahaha) and wanting to fly there with me on my first week of school there. I've the most amazing siblings, and together we joke and laugh and do imitations of Mr Brown and Ms Swan and movies, and have the BESTIMEVER. Not to mention my grandpa who was super against me going overseas at first but seeing as I really have the passion for law, changed tack instead to worrying about me not being able to cook edible meals for myself over there :P Oh and Mari, who wrote me a card saying she'll miss me when I go! SO SWEET. =) I've 2 extended families, one of which I grew up bossing around (since I was the oldest kid there) and love them all despite the idiosyncasies of each individual (Jolyn did a Jay Chou last week and YT is as irritating as ever), and one of which I found newfound friendship probably due to badminton largely ;) I have one friend who is willing to stay up with me from midnight till 4am to listen to me ranting about my inner conflicts and dilemnas when I'm upset, never complaining or judging me. (I love you Shuqi!) and that to me means I'm more cared for than most people I know of (imagine sleepy, tired, exhausted but still up listening to me so patiently??!) ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------ MY DOUBLE R.------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------ And last but definitely not least, I've an out-of-this-world Boyfriend (he claims he's from another planet and has 2 hearts and superman abilities. Right.) who has been super-duper-fantastically-supportive, urging me to go for my dreams even though I know it aches to be apart, having unwavering faith in me whenever I doubted my abilities, forgiving me when I used to hurt you with my pms and being too argumentative, wanting to know every single detail of my plans, up to the number of people in my hall to the food they serve in the cafeteria and promising to save up and try your best to come visit me, making me so so so happy with every little thing you do. You are my bestest friend and my soulmate and my guardian angel and my role model all in one, and I never want to lose you so you've to take care when I'm halfway round the world okay? Don't jaywalk (wow look who's talking), don't eat unhealthy food, and you know the rest of the nag I already told you a million times to take care of yourself. I think you probably learnt legilimency to be able to read my mind so well, you should know best how exasperated I get whenever we say the same thing at the same time, or you say EXACTLY what I was going to say (just a split second late eh?), or when we know we think the same thoughts but don't say it because some things can't be put into words... ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------ There are some times something simple makes me happy, whether it's eating icecream, chips, donuts, chicken, or seeing a really cute toddler, or looking at the pictures of the sunset you've taken for me at Bali. At these moments, I see your face light up as well, and you chuckle softly to yourself but I catch it, and that's when I know my happiness matters to you more than anything else... ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------ I am ecstatic to be given the chance to study at Bristol really, many of the finest lawyers have been produced there and I hope to follow their footsteps. =) But now first, it's the time to be thankful and grateful. (I am a free thinker btw, and I believe in God) ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------ Thank you God, for the way my life is. For the tremendous amount of happiness I feel, for the amazing people around me who I learn from, the wonderful people who care so much for me, and the infinite people I care for and will never stop caring for even if we may have lost touch. Thank you for my abilities to walk, to run like the wind when I feel happy, to swim like a dolphin when I'm carefree, and to dance to the music with confidence. Thank you for my abilities to talk, my freedom to speak, and patience to listen. Thank you so so much for each and every single experience you've put me through, happy ones, angry ones, sorrowful ones, for I've learnt so much from each and grown stronger. Thank you for the dreams I've woken with a smile from, for the nightmares that have taught me a lesson, for the slumber that entails rest and peace. Thank you, for the chance to live. To live to live to live. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------ I AM SO HAPPY TO BE ALIVE! ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------ But let's not forget to pray for those who need our prayers, our goodwill and our care. We will not think of them as weak, but vulnerable. We will not think of them as difficult, but unique. We will not think of them as unlucky, but the bearers of unseeable strength.

I LOVE MY AWESOME FAMILY

2007-07-04T16:05:00.000+08:00

Here's some random pictures: Ivan sleeping on MY bloatie-bear to irritate me... Me charging my phone with an unconventional method... My Dad has joined the Simpsons family... And lastly, ME AND MY FAVOURITE SISTER:)

THIS WAS TYPED ON MONDAY AFTERNOON: --------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Thanks to Tuck (Manager of Z Fencing)'s friendly disposition and warm nature, I found myself unwittingly putting myself down for FOUR fencing slots this week, one adult class even. Let's see how I die shall we? Tuesday Wednesday Saturday Sunday. -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Normal class, die because of PT PT PT (or so they zen-ly so call it "conditioning", as though to suggest a type of cooling air-conditioner type treatment), die because of tons of footwork and jogging and testing reflexes, die because of the immense cold white shining walls of the classroom. -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Adult class, ALSO die but because of huge beefy ang mohs who chuckle upon scoring oh-so-heartily, psycho-looking musclebound individuals (intimidating yet friendly Founders of Zfencing who seem to take permanent residence in the Balmoral studio) slapping their swords onto rubber targets, making it look as easy as waving a pencil in the air, the most brilliant teenage fencers who come for extra practise (out of sheer madness- oh wait i'll be one of them soon, not the brilliant part but the "mad" part.) But well, I'll take it like a soldier! -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Meanwhile, with Tis's evil (and rather scary) threats to refuse to teach me the steps to our 3rd solo ballet dance, I'm feeling even more screwed for the upcoming lesson with Mr Fan(TASTIC). OMG kill me. The dyslexia-inclined uncoordinated dancer. Okaylah. Only for one dance, I'm fine for the rest :D-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- An email from SMUlaw came saying the law camp is compulsory! But it's fully residential and held at Orchid Country Club (wow, advantages of being a small and pioneer batch huh :P) so i HOPE there won't be raunchy games of any kind rumoured to be game master's popular choice of orientation theme. --------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

My LNAT score fell short of the expectations everyone had of me after the great IELTS results i received. True, I was slightly above average, but still, slightly above average isn't sufficient to please me. Sigh. I just smsed Riz my results. He's been so sweet. I told him not to buy an indon number card cuz it's not worth it for 2 weeks, but he still did once he got home. Trouble is, the connection is so bad now (it was slightly unreliable the last time) I only get like 1/5 of his messages sent. Ytd he sent me abt 10+ in total out of which I only received 3. So at first I thought he was just busy with his family and all which is why I wasn't surprised to not receive any message from him until at night, and he, on the other hand (having already sent me his reply which i didn't receive thus didn't reply) thought I was the one who was busy. HAHAHA. Fantastic isn't it, modern technology? :P

However, it feels alot more manageable and bearable than last time despite us not meeting online at all, and smsing really seldom. It's possibly because it's just 2 weeks, and I know it's mainly cause of the strengthened trust and faith in our relationship which leads to me knowing with this unwavering faith that even without contacting each other for 2 weeks straight, we're constantly on each other's mind.. Also, loads of awful shit (pardon the language) has happened to us (being in dangerous company and stalker episodes and falling sick) and I've seen with increasing trust in him that he can take good care of himself and vice versa :)

You know what? I think we're ready for me to go to UK if need be. (:

I'm recalling an incident and can't laugh smiling to myself. On the last day we spent together before he left, Friday, we were at my house in the air-conditioned cooling TV room watching F.R.I.E.N.D.S when I suddenly turned to him saying I was going to miss him.. He pointed to the left side of my back and said "I'll be here if you need me." and I realised he was referring to my heart (why point to my back- it's out of decency). And he is.

Well, on hindsight after attending Tuesday's adult fencing class, it was tough (certainly not for pansies), and thanks to Coach Vino's leave (he went back to Philippines lucky for his girlfriend- we met her and she's quite cool and open, telling us they've been together for 5 years and are practically each other's life. Awww..), we got James, one of the 4 maestro founders of ZFencing. The huge beefy muscle bound intimidating looking coach I referred to earlier on. We had conditioning, I partnered with my Dad and kept collapsing into uncontrollable but muffled (by stuffing my jacket sleeve into my mouth) giggles looking at him do the exercises. (Don't say I'm mean, it was somehow just VERY hilarious, Tis saw him one lesson and agrees with me!) James complimented me on my footwork quite a few times (upon which I inwardly thanked Vino for his constant drilling and emphasis on footwork and basics), then after taking our class for 45 minutes, started on our handwork, upon which I was sorted to the Advanced group (to my dad and mom and even my own surprise) together with Alfred and this other cheena guy (PRC, riz ;) )

We were taken by XiaoNa, who really advanced the teaching till I had to think really quick to apply the appropriate step to attack,defend. Unlike the other big group, our group only had 3 people so the rest breaks were fairly short (and insufficient for my ailing atrophying arm muscles), such that I had to rely almost entirely on willpower at certain times to get me alive. (She's crazy I tell you, I got hit by the sword a few times even though I'm not even wearing any protective gear, helmet aside..!) James gave me some tips about my handwork after class and said he'd teach me more next Tuesday :D

Afterward, I went for dinner with my Dad and Mom. They were trying to choose between ChickenRice, Soup Kitchen, or this hawker with Hokkien Mee and Crab. In the end, we decided on the hawker, which had them complaining non-stop about the food (oh how terrible the cooking), and attacking each dish we tried. Hokkien mee totally tasteless, the soup of weird and rather uncooked ingredients, crab fried such that the crabmeat was shrivelled and unsatisfactory to our post-fencing appetites. HAHAHAHA. They said, the only consolation of the lousy dinner was my awesome company(: That sweet comment, ofcourse, was only made after they cooled down from my mom's "Feedback" to the waitress that, let me quote "We're never coming back here ever again", and my dad's "Feedback" to the waitress that the food is very "Nan2 Chi1". HAHAHA.

Oh, the other day (I think it was Monday), I was peacefully (not) reading Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince in my nice air-conditioned room with Ruffles propped next to me (trying to read it too despite his inadequate grasp of the English Language- they don't teach Bears very well in the BearWorkshop I think), Ivan kept bursting into the room and asking me questions on English Compre. I really mean "bursting" literally, because he was making a great deal of noise on purpose to irritate me. And I'd go "AUURRRGGGHHH" EVERYTIME he came in but he still hammered on happily and ignorantly with all the questions he had. Grrr.

I had so much fun on Tis's birthday! Normally our whole family would go out the entire day to celebrate birthdays, but Ivan had the chicken pox (he says "Box to pox :(")

so only Tis and I went out! First, we took 2 hours to get ready and make our grand exit from the house, then rushed to buy tickets for Transformers, then went to VivoCity to meet Rizki. We bought lunch at Carl's Junior (yum) and then da-baoed it to Harbourfront to eat. Riz and I gave her the present we got for her, and it's her FAVOURITEST PRESENT out of all presents she received! (Okay fine, aside from the iPod she got from my parents)

FINGER-DRUMSET! :D Actual sound simulation from tapping on it. And can record and replay. Cool huh?

Rizki told us about his weird 24 hours of events, and we listened amused and laughing at certain parts like the cat stalking him at his apartment area, the weird old lady on the MRT, the ants in his wallet, and the gangsters with Nicole Richie's voice! HAHAHA. Afterward, I hugged him bye and he went onto his ferry to Batam (then he took a plane to Bandung), and he called me afterward sounding abit emo but more naggy. HAHAHA.

We finished our lunch

(if you go to Carl's make sure to buy the criss-cross fries, they're WAY nicer than the normal ones!), then went to try on Tankinis. Let's hope she won't kill me for posting some pictures here...

Next, we checked out the donut queue, which was fairly okay (about 15 people in line), but we couldn't queue because we wouldn't be able to smuggle donuts into the cinema! Then we went into CoolBearWorkshop, and kept laughing at the very hilarious costumes the bears can choose from, like spiderman, tigger, cowboy.

The spiderman costume really tickled me (the first time I saw it was with Rizki on Thursday, and we couldn't stop laughing at the bear's ears sticking out of the costume!) even though it was the second time seeing it! Then we went into FaceShop and I was her nailpolish model to try various colours on since she got a manicure treat from Mer the previous day and couldn't try it on herself. I obliged (only because it was her birthday- hope you're reading this mei :P), which resulted in this:

Soon, we pretty much realised we were in the same predicament as we were in a year ago, (we rushed to J8 to watch Just My Luck on her birthday, late by 10 minutes), so we rushed back to PS and i think we were late by 5 minutes. HAHAHA. We pigged out on nachos throughout the movie, which resulted in my sweater (Rizki's actually) having some cheese dripping from it (which i frantically rushed to the toilet to wash off with soap afterward haha). The movie was fantastic, alot better than we'd expected cause we thot it be a boyish movie full of fighting and loud noises. Also also also, WE LOVE THE EVEN-STEVENS GUY! We've loved him since we watched him on Even Stevens, hilarious character! HAHAHA.

Then, we shared a Firehouse sundae courtesy of 30th June babies :D and got a Mango Icecream cake to da-bao home! But the rest of the pictures are in the digicam not my phone so I don't have it in my comp yet (as is the case with my other family pictures such as pulau ubin cycling trip, my birthday, gentings! SIGH. The pictures are AWESOME. )

Anyway, had loads of fun hanging out that day, the next day, and the day after that (only in the morning before that silly shark went to hang out with her friends instead of me *dramatic sob*) HAHAHA. ILOVEYOU SILLY SHARK! HAPPY 17th BIRTHDAY AND MAY YOU ALWAYS REMAIN CHEERFUL, PRETTY, HOT, FUNNY, AWESOME and a great ZE to us all :D Remember what I wrote in my card to you! :) LOVEYOU! -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- GOT TO GO FOR FENCING CLASS #2 of this week! WISH ME LUCK!! :D

Of a sudden recall to the past

2007-07-01T22:30:00.000+08:00

THANKS you two, the people who keep me happy and crazy and laughing all the time (:

<3>

I totally forgot to post pictures of when Rizki just came back to Singapore on 13th February 2007! :) And how coincidental that when I finally get the time to do this is when he's back in bandung. HAHAHA.

Anyway, here goes! :) Pictures from Valentine's Day aka our 2nd day together-after-not-seeing-each-other-for-3months 14th FEB:

We're not looking too perky or refreshed, he just spent the last 48 hours in flight + on sail + spending the late hours of the night of 13th feb and wee hours of the morning of 14th feb with me :), and i just spent the last 48 hours spring cleaning the entire house frantically (to be allowed out of the house) including the freaking antiques + having insomnia out of excitement + spending the late hours of the night of 13th feb and wee hours of the morning of 14th feb with him :)

Rizki couldn't stop laughing when I sat there and took a picture of me while I kept going "hurry up" cuz I was getting abit freaked out by the old-man-tree. And then we recalled our encounter with the old-man-tree-original-version during our 2nd month anniversary celebration (refer to old archived post to see full story on rizki freaking out :P)

Rizki in imitation of the spoon in "The Dish ran away with the Spoon" nursery rhyme.

Here's our pepsi advertisement, which looks more persuasively attractive? :)

But whatever it is... Always better together :)

Here's a few snapshots of the frantic days of jobhunting together.

The stack of letters is one out of the many stacks we had to sort for Melaleuca on our one-day stint there! (thanks soks for job recommendation ;) ) Fine hon I'll admit we worked there together :P

Good luck for the interview honey!

Us at Sentosa interview

Us at can't-even-remember-what interview:

Then here's us on the long-awaited results day, first trying to allay our worries by going all crazy and high in United Square, going to Popular bookstore for good karma (blatantly ignoring the fact that Cambridge already marked our papers eons ago), challenging each other on a very bloody and violent xbox game on display (he beat me obviously, i'm of gentle and demure nature :P), going to toys r' us and wrecking havoc playing with all the toys around and taking loads of pictures.

THEN, after the results came out, coming sober finally, talking abt our results and reflecting upon it (whoa) in the cool crisp ocean breeze before treating ourselves to Sushi Tei then dessert at Ben&Jerrys at Vivocity. :D

I blogged an entire chunk about HSBC but i won't post it until I can load all the pictures of my colleagues up! (There's tons of pictures and i'm sleepyyyyy)

My boyfriend's too far away...-------------------------------------------------------------------

to kill me for buying my first-ever BIKINI! :) --------------------------------------

He says i can only wear it when I'm with him.

(mumbles: "possessive..")

just kidding don't be angry honey!! :P

-------------------------------------------------------

SWIM GYM TAN tmr with my daddy and tis! (: love.

The randomness that comes with infrequent updating

2007-06-24T14:27:00.000+08:00

Thanks a ton girls for celebrating my birthday, albeit 18 days late but the thought that went into planning the free day, my presents and the cards is well appreciated by me. (:

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

I'm, well, deeply sorry bout my very much happy-emo message sent that night really late, and bout rushing home (I SWEAR the main reason wasn't to catch Desperate Housewives but my mom's curfew!- sad i know, 19 year old with a 930pm curfew- sometimes aptly stretched to 10pm on special occasions)- HINT TO PARENTS IF THEY ARE READING DEAR 19 YEAR OLD DAUGHTER'S BLOG ON BLACKBERRY :D

I hope we can all go on the trip to KL/Genting together, well, cause it's the last time we'll be able to spend quality time together before uni starts and even if i don't sail off into the nearing-ice-age climates of Europe for law studies, I think we'll hardly have time to meet up once uni starts, so give it a good thought you all, okay? Rizki already promised he'll take care of all of us (to mav: not just me :P) and I think he's supremely responsible and reliable and can be trusted with the safety and wellbeing of 5 girls right? Just to allay all worries and fears we'll be robbed/kidnapped/raped/molested as voiced at a very apt timing on Monday. ;)

My dad, (if you don't know him yet go scrimage for recent newspapers and you'll see his name I promise) has been desperately head-hunted by big companies, both local and international ones. He actually sought my opinion on which offer he ought to accept if he sails through the interview, and to my surprise when I gave him my opinion from a very 19-year old, eager-to-get-launched-on-career-path point of you, he actually gave it a great deal of consideration and looked quite convinced! *well done mel, pats own back*

According to my dear sister, I will be screwed next sunday during ballet since I didn't attend today's and Mr Fan's not too happy... *looks to nani for some sympathy* Oh and guess what, since I've been sick with a cold for bout 3 weeks, the doctor said I might be heading for pneumonia if I'm not careful.

*Practises saying the word "PNEUMONIA" in a very life-threatening tone to repeat next sunday during class when I get scolded: "pneumonia...." "pneumonia..."*

Anyway, read mav and xh's blog and find the entries on elits if you're interested in the elits. Hahaha. Mav: http://paperboat.blogspot.com/ Xh: http://thehoipolloi.blogspot.com/ and yes, that means "the ordinary people" which was meant as a derogatory term but she apparently didn't know when she set up her blog :P I shan't pretend I was smart and knew before her cuz I really didn't have a clue what it meant at all. Speaking of Xiaohui, we're gonna be classmates for at least a month! I'm so excited. (: I can't believe I was so stunned by the news I actually got in SMU law's intake (they just mailed me a letter a few days back- yes late I know, 2nd batch intake) that I kept talking to Xiaohui abt it on the phone for about 15 minutes before I realised we'd be classmates again! I could imagine her exasperated look when the realization dawned on me and I exclaimed "Omg we're gonna be classmates!" as though it were a ground-breaking discovery worthy of the Nobel Prize.

But I'll have to give it a good thought, now that the prospect of going to UK is alarmingly exciting to me, even almost enough to pacify my nagging worries about leaving my family and dear friends and favourite boy behind.

Out of the whole almost-3 months stint at HSBC, Rizki has never taken a single day off work no matter if he fell sick or had other important things to settle that required odious amounts of time. So you possibly imagine what a workaholic he is. WRONG. He's not a workaholic, he's just super responsible. So anyway, that statement was true.. until 21st June, when he told me in the morning after giving me a wake-up call that he felt sharp pains in his stomach and had difficulty walking even. After spending a worried 2hours in the office settling the urgent stuff at the speed of lightning and asking my officers for a half-day (more like 3/4 day) off, I sped down the highway towards his place in Sembawang. Fine, I wasn't that cool to the rescue, the truth was that I stepped onto the next Northward bound train.

The next part might sound a tad mushy so if you don't like reading such stuff I suggest you click on the button with the "X" on the top right hand corner right now.

Now.

I said now.

NOW.

Well.. When I let myself into the apartment I saw him lying on the mattress at the other end of the living room (his room got so messy he couldn't sleep in there anymore) and looking quite sick, and I think my heart stopped for a moment really. I closed the door behind me and ran to him and gave him a really big hug. Oh, then I (force)fed him a nutrition bar and an entire cup of water. The feeling was quite indescribable, I wanted to bring him to the doctor as fast as I could, yet I couldn't stop hugging him.. possibly cause the last I saw him was Monday night when he popped by Swensens for a short chat with the elits (I was on MC tuesday and a full day family outing celebrating Ivan's birthday involving a cycling trip in Pulau Ubin in which I got my period and cramped really badly and... you get the idea generally within the scope of Murphy's Law) and that I really wished just by hugging him I could make him feel better. My worries melted away slightly as he hugged me back so tight it felt he was hanging onto me for his dear life and whispered into my hair "I'm feeling alot better now, thanks for coming..." as though he read the worried thoughts going through my head, then cheekily added "You should be a doctor" while kissing my forehead.

No worries, I took him to the doctor soon after and then to lunch, then back to his place where I made sure he got tons of rest and ate his medicine. Apologies to Shuqi for having to cancel our threesome dinner plans together, hope Monday works out fine! =)

I've been dying to post pictures of my birthday I celebrated with my family, (yes you're family too hon) and pictures of my ubin cycling trip but the memory card reader compatible with the camera's card has been with my mom for ages! Promise to post them soon.

ANYWAYS,

for those brave readers who have followed my entry thus far.. I'm ending work coming wednesday, and spending thursday+friday with the boyfriend before he flies off to Bandung+Bali (lucky huh?) for 2 weeks. SO. Those who've been badgering me for free time, Ile be free from 2nd Jul onwards notwithstanding SMU's orientation programmes and medical checkup! SO, movie, shopping, bowling, sports, or even just a meal, ask me out and I'll be there! (Obviously if there is more than one person turning up if you are not female) *strong hint to certain dense people*

Chieh and Dory better meet me soon.. I've bought their birthday presents in super-advance since I may not be around for it.

An inside joke cracked sometime near Christmas 2006 in my house:

See ya folks soon! (:

A very happy 19th birthday

2007-06-01T22:07:00.000+08:00

It is indeed a time of great change for me. ---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- I feel less and less the need to blog, because those who I'd care to know about my life would have been informed already. ---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Anyway, I had a indescribably happiest birthday of my life yesterday celebrated with my family and rizki. There was hardly any moment not filled with laughter, screaming, chatting, joking, suanning, sharing of anecdotes jokes and other hilarious lunch/tea/dinner/supper conversation. ---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- You know the normal laughter? It wasn't even close to that. It was like uncontrollable, ecstatic and rather hysterical laughter from everyone. It really made me smile having birthday messages from friends, ancient old and new ones. It really made me grin seeing messages from especially yana-not-minah (who purposely asked around for my number just to sms me happy birthday), sam and ade whose messages were really funny, and sok meng (cos i was surprised a 50 year old woman i made good friends with at indon class remembered my birthday and bothered to sms me!) It made me tear when Rizki gave me his first birthday present, and also when the second one came (I'll tell y'all the story of Bloatie later), and also reading Chieh's message to me with our 6.5 years of friendship reminder and friendship code at the bottom. It made me giggle listening to the lame jokes my dad and rizki kept telling the whole day. It made me laugh seeing Rizki's traumatized and trying-to-act-brave face when we wanted to sit the scary rides. ---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- The highlights of my day: ---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Sitting on the 'Superman' ride with Rizki and him going "I can't see your face!" HAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHA. ---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Me and tis sitting behind Rizki and Ivan in the rollercoaster and watching the contrast between them: Ivan sitting super still throughout and Rizki being flung and slung here and there and his hair going crazy all over the place! ---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- We played this game where you're supposed to roll the ball into "Run", "Trot" or "Walk" holes in your machine then your horse will move at different speeds, and between 12 players playing, you're obviously supposed to get yours to move fastest to reach the end point first! The prize she showed us was this SUPER CUTE bear! So we sat in a row along with other strangers playing the game: My mom, me, tis, rizki, ivan. My dad stood behind me and cheered me! =) I rolled into "Run" about 3 times, and "Walk" the rest of the time, and my dad said "You're leading!" and kept going and in the end, the bell rang and I looked up and saw my horse second! It was beaten by another horse by an inch!! :( I was wondering who beat me, and suddenly i saw the woman manning the counter pass the SUPER CUTE bear to Rizki! And I was like "OMG!" and everyone was like cheering and laughing and guess what? He turned to me and passed it to me saying "Happy birthday!" I was so touched I started tearing abit okay.. HAHAHA. And after that he told me he really wanted to win it for me.. =) ---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- There was this suspicious looking ride called the "Inverter" and nobody wanted to sit it except for Tis. So she went, and I was starting to feel abit guilty for not going with her... UNTIL i saw her happy laughey face and i wasn't guilty anymore but more like "what's with her??". HAHAHA. We ran to the side where we could see her face clearly, and I pointed out "There!!" cos I spotted this mess of brownish hair. And when she was facing us, Rizki went "She's smiling!" in this incredulous manner, and after one more round of upside down rotation, we saw her again and Rizki went "She's laughing!!?!?" with this super shocked look, and after yet ANOTHER round of rotation, Rizki said "She's really enjoying herself, she's so Happy Tree Friends!" which cracked all of us up super hard.. And we kept repeating what he said to each other cos it was so hilarious HAHAHAHA. ---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- In the Haunted House, (I was forced to go in, I'm super scared of the supernatural), we were all clinging onto each other in one long chain, and I was hiding my face in my mom's arm and she kept reprimanding me for being such a coward (HAHAHA) and Rizki was clinging onto my hand super tight like his life depended on it! (HAHAHA) We both were the most scaredy cat out of all! =) ---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- We rode this super retardedly slow kiddy choo choo train which went in 2 circles around the bushes and ivan kept laughing madly and ringing the bell and my mom was laughing madly along with him (SERIOUSLY MADLY, her mouth looked like it was gonna split from laughing), we were all laughing so hard for dunno what reason but it was so hilariously ridiculous and retarded :) ---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- OH i forgot to mention, Rizki's super sweet. During the Go-Kart advanced track ride, he stayed at the back of my whole family to make sure we were all okay. Cos there was this guy (there were 6 of us plus that irritating guy at that one go) who kept bumping into people and speeding super fast. No wonder the temp girls told me that "if you don't want Rizki, i'll pounce!" and "he's soooo cute!" and "he's super cute!" and "he's a very good catch you musn't let him go!" HAHAHAHA. And those aren't even the 'haters'. Lol. ---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Thanks all for the well wishes, smses, cards, msn wishes, I feel loved! :) ---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- to be continued on the hilarious dessert...

Nothing short of the finest updates

2007-05-23T20:56:00.000+08:00

I'm going to ____ to study _____! (secret.) -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Rizki loves me very very very very much. (don't ask, i just know.) -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- My mom told me that at a HSBC mini meeting, I was dubbed the "Top performing temp." (RIGHT..) -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- I officially had one of my lifetime do-before-I-die-goals granted! (Phantom of the Opera!) -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- My period came when I did the split during ballet. (Loser.) -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- I've some haters who have a mini-crush on Rizki. Giggle giggle flirt. (Gross..) -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Well, love me or hate me, it's still an obsession. =) -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- My daddy's heart is fine! (<3) -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- My ____ and my mommy's _____ is coming up soon! (So easy to guess.) -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Pirates of the carribean, Oceans 13, Shrek 3 and Fantastic 4 II is coming up! (AWESOME, OH WOW!) -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- I'm on episode 13 of "All about Eve", this korean drama and I am so hooked. -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Australia's road trip has been postponed =( But hopefully Dory can drive (SAFELY) by then! -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- MAS 626 can kiss my butt. -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Most often heard phrases in office: - ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Thank you you! (Sam) -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Zhi dao ma? Zhi dao ma zhi dao ma zhi dao ma??? (Ai lang to Margaret) -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Kenasai! (Margaret) -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Mommy margaret! (My whole team on my influence) -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- It's mama san margaret lah! (Me) -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- You say somemore I will sell you to geylang! (Mommy margaret) -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- HEAH HEAH HEAH *horriblest and evilest laughter imaginable* (Kelvin) -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Jieeeeee... (Alex) -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Alex calm down! (Molly Berlandier the scary manager) -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Aunty Tay! (my whole team, also thanks to my influence *smirk*) -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- No aunties! (Adelene TAY) -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Good morning HSBC, ___ speaking, how may I help you? (all) -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Thank you very little hor. (Mommy margaret- man that woman is hilarious!) -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- You're sitting on my imaginary friend! (me to Nor) -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Ade i'm scared! Hold my hand ade! (Yana being scared of my schizo-cism) -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Do you all miss me?? (me) -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- YES! Nobody answers the phone when you're gone! (Ade and Yana) -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Eh Melissa when is your last day? We go to Fullerton to celebrate! (Sam) -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Your aunty is here, careful! (Ade talking abt Choymei) -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- She's not my aunty! (me) -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Your aunty is there! (Rizki talking abt Choymei) -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- She's not my aunty! (me) -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Boy boy! Boy boy! Ni zai na li... (Alex's irritating message tone) -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Melissa pass me the printout please! (Yana) -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- No! (me, but passes it to her anyway) -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- So sweet! (other temp staffs' comments on me taking Indon class) -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- How come August is taking so long to come.. (Mommy Margaret- her daughter's in Japan for one semester)-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- It's almost here, only 2 months plus see.. (yana and me)-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- I got eyebags! I need more sleep! (Ade)-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Let's go see Karen Keow together! (office doctor hahaha)-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Continue another time................. -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Love me or hate me it's still an obsession. Love me or hate me that is the question. If you love me then, thank you! If you hate me then ___ you. =)

Stop laughing at me up there!

2007-05-19T09:03:00.000+08:00

It's just bad when you want this someone to really understand you, to really be there for you...

Yet he struck out on both counts.

But the ultimate irony of the situation

that makes you feel like

the big guy up there is laughing at you

Is that this other person was always there for you

and somehow able to understand you

even though you didn't say express yourself coherently

or clearly

or sometimes at all.

Someone who makes you so mad

you want to hate

yet you ~~don't~~ can't.

Yet bounces along so cheerily

you could just imagine the grin

when you hear 'Come on, be my friend?'

Someone who tells you

your flaws, your faults, your weaknesses

right in your face

yet you don't feel the blow

probably cos of the way it was said.

Someone who doesn't mean

a damn thing to you

except a friend

yet knows you so much damn better

than he does.

Quote dory: "The way one person says it might be the way the other person likes to hear it. So in that way they fit."

But it doesn't mean anything more than this, nothing more than what I'm writing in this entry so don't read between any lines.

Where were you when I needed you?

And don't say HSBC please.

Complicated truths, potential webs of lies and deception (which I'm obviously avoiding through this transparent entry) are usually just a simple truth.

~~You weren't there, he was.~~

The truth of what happened was as simple as that.

I want a payrise too!

2007-04-10T13:54:00.000+08:00

You know, it's natural they want more pay, to live in lavishing comfort and overwhelming luxuries. It's human fallability. It's just come way past the time we could trade our fish for your silk cloth in the little village and be happy with each other and live happily like a Silas Marner-like setting. Back to my point, it just disgusts me when they start apologizing, and justifying their actions with fallacious reasons all can see as flawed. -----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------Severely underpaid? ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------ According to www.dictionary.com, the definition of "underpaid" is:------------------------------------------------------un·der·pay /ˌʌndərˈpeɪ/ Pronunciation Key - Show Spelled Pronunciation[uhn-der-pey] Pronunciation Key - Show IPA Pronunciation ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------ –verb (used with object), -paid, -pay·ing. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------ to pay less than is deserved or usual. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------ ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Deserved- How do we judge who is deserving of what pay? In the first place, I don't agree with this definition, because there is no moralistic benchmark to tell us what is deserving and what is not. A road sweeper is out there, slogging his/her guts out the entire day under hot sweltering sun and the almost-unbearable humidity of Singapore, yet he/she earns in the range of $100-$400 maybe, and some people sitting in their offices the entire signing documents or rejecting documents, occasionally showing their faces on TV earn (soon to be) $1.9 million (and still hoping to reach the 'rightful' $2.2 million). ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------ I'm not trying to say that Roadsweepers work harder than Ministers, or vice-versa, I'm just saying they work hard to serve our society in different ways. The Roadsweeper exerting physical labour, whereas the Ministers through mental labour. Who is to judge what is "deserving" of what pay? It just happens that our society values education at its core, thus those more educated will earn more logically. It appalls me that even dictionary definitions have connotations of being "deserving" when there is simply nothing moralistic about the amount of pay one receives according to jobscope. If you really want to discuss who deserves what pay, I'd say teachers are severely underpaid, not our dear Ministers. Especially our primary school teachers in government schools, who teach both morning and afternoon shifts, ask them their working hours and pay. Ask them how much marking they have to do at home, or preparation for class and you'd be shocked. "Wealth after all is a relative thing since he that has little and wants less is richer than he that has much and wants more." - Charles Caleb Colton (1780-1832) British Sportsman, Writer ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------ Usual- If they want to use 'usual' as their benchmark, let's take a look at this article written on YawningBread, stating that top civil servants in England and Australia earn $300K-$400K (in Sing currency). ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------ Singapore government promotes obscenity - how else would you describe raising already high ministerial salaries? ---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- http://www.yawningbread.org/arch_2007/yax-726.htm ---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Something as numerical as pay has gotten so emotive because of the fact that they are our leaders of the nation, and also their insensitivity in language which invokes enormous reactions in the public saying their pay compared to the minister's initial pay of $1.2 million is pathetic and the ministers' shouldn't be complaining. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------ The only people who'd be able to argue with them are probably brilliant lawyers but then those people themselves are too busy earning their millions themselves. Heh. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------ I watched the recent Video News on Straitstimes Interactive (Go to http://www.straitstimes.com and click on Top Story's Video News) or just click on this directly: http://www.straitstimes.com/vgn-ext-templating/v/index.jsp?vgnextoid=c03286105abf9010VgnVCM1000000a35010aRCRD&vgnextfmt=vgncimid:f7ff3a906c6d1110VgnVCM100000430a0a0aRCRD ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------And one line really cracked me up. "So we know that financial rewards cannot, and should not be the main motivation of those in the public service. We don't want pay to be the reason for people to join us. But we also don't want pay to be the reason for them not to join us, or to leave us after joining us." ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------ According to their reasoning, the people who join them should not be people who take pay as any form of motivation in serving the nation. That makes sense. But then, they justify the pay increase so that the pay will not deter people from joining them or abandon them. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Now, the question is what he meant by pay being "the reason for them not to join us..." He could only mean 2 things. Did he mean they would not join because the pay is---------------------------------------------------------------------------------- 1. Not as high as the top people working in the private sector?------------------------------------------------------ or 2. Not reasonable enough to even sustain their lifestyle?------------------------------------------------------ Loopholes:------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------ 1. If that is what he meant, his first statement of not wanting people to take money as any form of motivation in serving the nation is invalid, because it would be in their consideration of choosing a livelihood, and thus in their motivation for serving the nation.---------------------------------- 2. If THIS is what he meant, I think you all can start laughing at me. Or if you insistently agree with him, let's all take a moment to ponder in what ways would $1.2 million annually be insufficient to support one's lifestyle, let's say excluding all possibilities any of them have like 12 children to feed and support. (But then they're all probably too busy trying to increase their pay to increase our Singaporean population)------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------v------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------ If we want to show our appreciation to our Ministers, let's show it now. On our blogs, on forums, letters to the newspapers, debates, newsletters. Why use money to show it? Money is not words, it doesn't express how we feel. I personally feel that our Ministers are to be admired for their intelligence, their adaptability to changing circumstances, and their eagerness to grab opportunities that come. However, I do not wish for the payrise to be an avenue in which I can thank them. (The best form of monument a political leader could have would be the generations of joyful, useful and well-equipped-for-life citizens (of his country) that he has put great effort to bring on. - stockhunter (rnc-2007 & living ... not just alive) --------------------------------------------------------If you want to know your real wealth and worth , count the lives that you have touched and made better. - stockhunter (rnc -2007 & living .. not just alive) ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------ Regardless, as we all know the media is the 4th estate of government and is being constantly (ummm) editted by them, here's something to laugh about. I applaud your patience to read through my incessantly argumentative entry. (given the decision is done) Have a good laugh. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------ Podcast on ground reactions to ministers' payrise and the portrayal of the media: http://www.mrbrownshow.com/?p=818 ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------ The writer of this blog will not take any responsibility for tags or comments regarding this entry. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------ Taking the week off to prepare for the SMU law interview. Really hope to hear from NUS law fac soon. So if you want my glorious company anytime this week you just have to ask. ;) But you'd probably have to accompany me to the LKC Library at Bugis while I pore over books. Joy (: My bosses are hilarious: ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------ Hi Lionel and Chris ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------ This is to inform you I will be absent the rest of this entire week except for friday afternoon, as I am preparing for the SMU law interview on friday morning. I'm sincerely sorry for such short notice, it just occurred to me this morning I probably need 3 full days in preparation for the interview. Thank you for your kind understanding. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------To Chris:------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------ I have gone up to Lionel Tay's office twice yesterday but he was not in both times. I will try to look for him again on Friday afternoon. Thank you very much for arranging my further attachment outside the iTec department. --------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------Melissa------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------ Hi Melissa,------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------Best of luck with your interview with SMU. I don't think they are going to test you on your knowledge of the law. They will probably be assessing to see how well-read you are, what motivates you, how you approach problems.------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------Regards------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------Lionel Tan---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------Partner---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------iTec Practice Group-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------Rajah & Tann-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------Lionel,(this is Lionel Tay btw, not the Lionel Tan I emailed who's my current boss. This Lionel Tay's in the Business and Finance Insolvency Dept I'm abt to be transferred to)------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------Melissa will be away for 3 days until Friday afternoon. She is preparingfor SMU interview. I keep telling her to go to England to study (which her father has offered) but she still wants to stay in Singapore. So I will ask her to look for you on Friday afternoon. Thanks for agreeing to take Melissa in.------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------Chris------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------ No problems, Chris - happy to help out. I will also, on my part, try to get her to go to England to study - SMU and England? no brainer, I would have thought...------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------Cheers. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------Lionel Tay------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------Partner, ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------Rajah & Tann------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------OMG. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------P.S: With regards to the title of my entry, I'm currently earning zero pay. (That's a glam way of saying I'm doing free labour) but fine, I'll learning lots too at the same time! Plus as I announced on my previous entry, I'm tutoring FOC, which leaves me to survive on $40 a week allowance I'm grateful my parents still provide. (: Oh, anyway as I was saying about the title, it's ironic isn't it?------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------Cheers for this space to air my thoughts, and have a good week ahead all. Finally, I leave you with this last quote to ponder over: "If a free society cannot help the many who are poor, it cannot save the few who are rich." - John Fitzgerald Kennedy (1917-1963) 35th U.S. President (1961-63)

a letagi

2007-04-06T13:06:00.000+08:00

Oh my, my blog's really screwed up now. No idea why there's no spacings there. So annoying isnt it? Chieh and Dory just stayed over at my place, it was freaking hilarious and fun=) love them both (: For really short summarized updates: I'm tutoring Effie FOC now, cos i realised the pay isn't much difference to me, and I don't feel too good collecting pay when I haven't seen her make significant improvement yet. Also so I can come more often to drill her and Judy won't mind it. =) Law internship is fricking fun, i'm serious. Got to blog abt this in detail next time. My daddy's coming back from london today! But going again soon after :/ The fiasco that blew over was really draining on all of us, not just you. So although I know you care alot for her and love her alot, AND respect that fact, please do control your emotions/anger next time. Don't do things on impulse, don't keep making decisions you regret and hurt those around you, not just yourself, not just her, but also your family, and rizki and me. If you know what we went through the whole week (willingly because we care too) for her, you'd know you weren't being too responsible or cool in handling the situation. You have to remember this, much as we'd want to, we can't always be there... So life's been a carousel, as dory's blog sums it up too well. With it's ups and downs, albeit unpredictable. With it's fun, it's pain, it's laughter, it's fear. Whatever it is, life's journey is never smooth. It's full of pain, falls, obstacles... It always helps when someone holds your hand and walks with you all the way... I blogged this a few days ago but didn't post it: Sometimes I feel like i've to be everywhere at once, like there are more people who need me than I realise. I just wished I was stronger and i wish i could be there for all of them. And i also learnt that all of us go through pain. Pain of seeing someone you care about in denial, pain of broken trust, pain of constantly falling, pain of having to prove your worth to others, pain of letter the anger consume you and eat you up, pain of being pushed away, pain of being left behind... Pain of constant worry about someone a thousand miles away, pain of estrangement, pain of needing security so bad it affects our identity and our pride... The pain of not having others understand our faith, the pain of having someone change how they feel about you, the pain of not meeting the expectations we set ourselves, the pain of seeing the poeple we love feeling down, pain of seeing them cry, pain of seeing them fall sick... The pain of our feelings not being reciprocated, the pain of losing someone we love, worse still the pain of not cherishing them before that... All we can do, is to hold our heads high.. To pick ourselves up and brush the dust off ourselves to smile as much as you're hurting and dying inside to heal, to smile, to laugh, to love again... to learn your lesson so that you don't make the same mistakes again so you don't hurt because of that mistake again.. we all make mistakes and we all learn. =)

belated post

2007-04-03T15:36:00.000+08:00

I blogged this 6 days ago, on 28th March Wednesday: Watching The Runaway Jury (Rizki's recommendation) sparked off a recent interest of mine in weighing the pros and cons of the US versus the UK law systems. find out about difference between civil law and common law http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Civil_law_%28legal_system%29 Imagine you are accused of murder, and you really did it, but let's say you did it in a fit of madness or seizure. Would you want your life in the hands of ONE judge well-versed in law and the judiciary, OR would you want your life in the hands of 12 people, uneducated about law with their own differing opinions about the matter? I may get murdered personally for saying this, but I'd pick the 12 people anytime. =) But then in the first place I don't even agree with the death penalty, and since most countries have moved away from that, I think it's time Singapore grew up and did the same. And if you're curious you can ask me why I don't support the death penalty, but just for the super curious people who don't know me to ask me, it's not because of any religious viewpoints but my personal reasoning. Speaking of religious takes, the lawyer who led the suit Roe vs Wade actually switched to the other side after conversion to Christianity, turning pro-choice to pro-life in a matter of months. And what was said by the american courts inspired me: The Court's determination of whether a fetus can enjoy constitutional protection was separate from the notion of when life begins: "We need not resolve the difficult question of when life begins. When those trained in the respective disciplines of medicine, , and \u003ca title\u003d\"Theology\" href\u003d\"http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Theology\" target\u003d\"_blank\" onclick\u003d\"return top.js.OpenExtLink(window,event,this)\"\>\ntheology\u003c/a\> are unable to arrive at any consensus, the \u003ca title\u003d\"Judiciary\" href\u003d\"http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Judiciary\" target\u003d\"_blank\" onclick\u003d\"return top.js.OpenExtLink(window,event,this)\"\>judiciary\u003c/a\>, at this point in the development of man's knowledge, is not in a position to speculate as to the answer." The Court only believed itself positioned to resolve the question of when a right to abortion begins.\n\u003c/p\>\n\u003cp\> \u003c/p\>\n\u003cp\>(taken from C:\\Documents and Settings\\visitor\\My Documents\\mel\\Roe v_ Wade - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia.htm)\u003c/p\>\n\u003cp\>Just in case the people in my department happen to go blogsurfing and sue me for plagarism or not acknowledging the source or whatever. Hahaha. \u003c/p\>\n\u003cp\>And just for the really blur and confused, I'm doing an internship at the iTec dept (intellectual property) of R&T. Which reminds me of the funniest incident, how nic and i were talking so loudly about pirated dvds at office. \n\u003c/p\>\n\u003cp\>So we were talking about TV series\u003c/p\>\n\u003cp\>Nic: Hey do you watch One Tree Hill?\u003c/p\>\n\u003cp\>Me: Nope, I'm into Desperate Housewives now hahaha\u003c/p\>\n\u003cp\>Nic: Oh yeah that's not bad I follow it too\u003c/p\>\n\u003cp\>Me: I watched half of Season 3 already!\u003c/p\>\n\u003cp\>Nic: (surprised) \u003c/p\>\n\u003cp\>note: for those who aren't fans of Desperate Housewives, Season III is showing on Channel 5 every monday at 10pm-11pm, it's currently at the 4th episode :p\u003c/p\>\n\u003cp\>Me: Oh, because Rizki got me the pirated ___ from Indo\u003c/p\>\n\u003cp\>Suddenly, both of us shut up and freeze, look around the office as if anytime a policeman will pop up and arrest us, or one of the lawyers will pop up with a menacing grin and wave a cassette tape saying "I taped it all down" *insert evil chuckle*\n\u003c/p\>\n\u003cp\>Then suddenly:\u003c/p\>\n\u003cp\>Nic: (super loudly on purpose) Eh I watch pirated DVDs at home leh!\u003c/p\>\n\u003cp\>Me: Oh my god!\u003c/p\>\n\u003cp\>HAHAHAHA.\u003c/p\>\n\u003cp\>Aren't we just the interns of the year. ",1] ); //--> philosophy, and theology are unable to arrive at any consensus, the judiciary, at this point in the development of man's knowledge, is not in a position to speculate as to the answer." The Court only believed itself positioned to resolve the question of when a right to abortion begins. (taken from C:\Documents and Settings\visitor\My Documents\mel\Roe v_ Wade - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia.htm) Just in case the people in my department happen to go blogsurfing and sue me for plagarism or not acknowledging the source or whatever. Hahaha. And just for the really blur and confused, I'm doing an internship at the iTec dept (intellectual property) of R&T. Which reminds me of the funniest incident, how nic and i were talking so loudly about pirated dvds at office. So we were talking about TV series Nic: Hey do you watch One Tree Hill? Me: Nope, I'm into Desperate Housewives now hahaha Nic: Oh yeah that's not bad I follow it too Me: I watched half of Season 3 already! Nic: (surprised) note: for those who aren't fans of Desperate Housewives, Season III is showing on Channel 5 every monday at 10pm-11pm, it's currently at the 4th episode :p Me: Oh, because Rizki got me the pirated ___ from Indo Suddenly, both of us shut up and freeze, look around the office as if anytime a policeman will pop up and arrest us, or one of the lawyers will pop up with a menacing grin and wave a cassette tape saying "I taped it all down" *insert evil chuckle* Then suddenly: Nic: (super loudly on purpose) Eh I watch pirated DVDs at home leh! Me: Oh my god! HAHAHAHA. Aren't we just the interns of the year. \n\u003cp\>Heh, like asking for it man. \u003c/p\>\n\u003cp\> \u003c/p\>\n\u003cp\>Also, the reason I haven't been online often these days is because I cannot access alot of sites from office, including blogger and msn. And since I actually have a life (this is not in comparison to anybody i swear), I tend to reach home about 10pm each night and fall asleep around 11. \n\u003c/p\>\n\u003cp\> \u003c/p\>\n\u003cp\>Ok, now let's move on to more interesting stuff.\u003c/p\>\n\u003cp\>Rizki has been singing me a lullaby everynight starting from a week ago! Surprisingly, he didn't go out of tune, and his voice really had a soothing lulling effect which helped when I couldn't fall asleep. Oh yeah and we've developed a couple's OCD (once again, not everybody wants to know abt my personal life so ask me if you want to know) hahaha\n\u003c/p\>\n\u003cp\> \u003c/p\>\n\u003cp\> \u003c/p\>\u003c/div\>\n",0] ); D(["ce"]); //--> Heh, like asking for it man. Also, the reason I haven't been online often these days is because I cannot access alot of sites from office, including blogger and msn. And since I actually have a life (this is not in comparison to anybody i swear), I tend to reach home about 10pm each night and fall asleep around 11. Ok, now let's move on to more interesting stuff. Rizki has been singing me a lullaby everynight starting from a week ago! Surprisingly, he didn't go out of tune, and his voice really had a soothing lulling effect which helped when I couldn't fall asleep. Oh yeah and we've developed a couple's OCD (once again, not everybody wants to know abt my personal life so ask me if you want to know) hahaha -- and i stopped there. HAHAHA. i've got a newer post coming right up, less whimsical than this one =)

Just fellow law ;)

2007-03-21T13:46:00.000+08:00

So I just returned from the Supreme court from a corporate case in which the settlement was worth a few millions of dollars. (Everybody say 'whoa' pls) The partner who brought me with him was Chris Woo, who did a last minute tactical change. Well, that's enough details before they sue me for not honouring confidentiality within the firm. I'm going to follow Clarence (this litigations lawyer who looks scarily enough like Joanne Loo) to court on Friday (that means black suit, white shirt and black pants again) - oh WITH shoulder pads on my black coat, supposedly in the working world to downplay feminity and display power or capability. I haven't read friday's case files yet, yet another stack of legal mumbo jumbo I've to struggle through and ask them questions they'd answer with a rather surprised how-can-you-not-know expression. (HAHA) Today morning's court hearing has been a new experience for me. Firstly, it's been my virginal step into a court (well, not the High courts yet since nobody was murdered or trafficking drugs), and secondly, I had the experience of meeting the defendant's lawyer and witnessing the surprisingly friendly relationship between him and Chris. Michael (the defendant's lawyer) told us many stories of the cases he handled such as divorce cases, a cab driver's vandalism of a speed camera (??!) and Chris added on telling us about this woman who was charged with a case of road rage, to put it in simple terms, she got angry and kicked this guy's balls (literally), which led to no permanent or serious damage except he got even more angry and sued her for it. (absolutely ridiculous!) I also got to make friends with the defendant lawyer's intern, Niven, a kid like me who just came out of NS (fine i didn't go to NS), but the point is that we're both waiting to enter law school. And somehow we ended up talking about Jakarta's amazing donuts and all sorts of randomness. The registrar (the judge for a summary case) was extremely efficient because he typed whatever was said immediately which Chris said is highly unusual and untypical of usual court procedings. But he sarcastically commented on both parties' latecoming once we entered the room, which left an atmosphere of tension, which was broken through the protocol courtroom lingo of addressing the judge and each other. Aside from the courtroom drama, I've just been helping out some of the lawyers with their work. Sometimes mundane admin, and sometimes real research and analysis of data. Whatever it is, no two things I do are completely the same, or even closely related. I could be doing a webcheck to catch cybersquatters (web criminals), then next would be to register Jap anime copyright owners and licensees, then to run a streetdirectory and online check on the registration of temples and churches in Singapore, or even to search a client's passport for proof of his alibi (in this case his claim that he wasn't in Singapore at a certain date to have committed a crime). And each time I help out a lawyer, I get to talk to them for quite awhile about various things like where they studied law, their experiences in the career so far etc. The partners are all quite fatherly, and the lawyer are a bunch of funky people out of which most of them are absolutely obsessed with the english league football. I even have had a fellow intern much to my surprise (and to some extent delight), since I wasn't expecting any people my age to be working with me. Needless to say, nic and i basically hit it off pretty well from the start because he's the type of guy you can suan or insult without getting too much of the blow back. Oh, yesterday morning's breakfast was really fun because Chris Woo brought me down to the cafeteria and I got to meet many lawyers and partners from different departments such as the shipping, litigations and corporate department. (I'm currently in the iTec dept btw, which specialises in Intellectual Property) They ended up comparing education in each country and sharing experiences in overseas universities which was hilarious and entertaining. And ofcourse, more talk on books, philosophy and free speech. ;) I'll be transferred to different departments to try out different things, which I really appreciate. P.S: Ytd was Mari's birthday and my whole family celebrated for her. Tis and I and Riz went shopping for her presents- we got her earrings, a nice top and a book of christian verses. And ytd as I was leaving work to meet Rizki for awhile, Charissa, one of the young lawyers, came in and passed me a thick book on human psychology called Human Dynamics, which introduces a system of categorizing personality types into 9, our of which 5 predominant ones are analyzed. And guess what? With her sweet innocent smile (she really is nice btw), she asked if I could finish reading it by the next morning (aka this morning). Apparently, our client (the writer of this book) is sueing a writer of another psychology book uncomfortably similar to that of our client's for infringement of intellectual property, basically copying their ideas. So I (somehow, through a fortunate interest in psychology) managed to finish the book last night before I slept, albeit wanting to hang out with Rizki and celebrating Mari's birthday and listening to my dear sister's tragic story of her (eh hem) life. We'll be doing a cross comparison with the so-called copycat book to see if there's any grounds on which our case can stand, but it's lunch hour just up and everyone's still out of office (except me that is, since I had an early lunch with Chris Woo at the cricket club, you know the one next to the padang and SRC). P.P.S: Speaking of the book, I panicked when I came back into my office and realised the book wasn't on my table, then I immediately went next door to nic's office and no prizes for guessing, it was resting on his table. So I took the book back and left a post-it note telling him I'm sueing him for stealing my book. =) P.P.P.S: Thanks kangwei for the help in translating japanese websites. P.P.P.P.S: Rizki has been fantastically supportive and I couldn't ask for more. =)

<3

2007-03-18T23:05:00.000+08:00

:) <3 i love my daddy, my mommy, my silly shark mei, ivan (or iben), yeye, nainai, mari, rusty.. and i love rizki ramadhan =)

bloody ridiculous

2007-03-06T22:25:00.000+08:00

The only people who are worse than hypocritical people are people who are hypocritical, yet make a big fuss and a whole bloody righteous moral speech on how they detest hypocritical people, WHILE emphasizing their own ethical goodness. Like, get a life. wtf. yeah, you're damned right i'm angry.

One way or another

2007-02-26T09:42:00.000+08:00

Aren't they so cute? My favourite girl is the one on the left, April :) No prizes for guessing who my favourite boy is ;) I took this from rizki's friendster. Doesn't he look like an angel when he's sleeping? =)

I had a pimple outburst. ='( Ok fine, one pimple. It was quite painful though!

The gay looking manager of the football team. Nani: Guys look so WRONG in turtlenecks? Me: Really? Nani: Like that guy (points) Me: OMG YAH. hello mr art-director-turned-football-manager, we're very sorry to disagree with your fashion sense. no, actually we're not :D I got my new Nokia 5300 finally! And have been plunged into a streak of narcissm, or rather 'shutterslutting' as nani puts it aptly. A really random picture. One day I went down for lunch and to my amusement, mari put FOUR spoons and 1 fork at my tablemat. Am I THAT much of a glutton?? The newest addition to my closet! A hot bandung tshirt which my honey went to all the trouble for and took 3 trips to the mall to get it for me to make sure it was the right size :) I sent tran off back to vietnam a couple of weeks ago. For every bad memory, there are a 100 sweet memories... I will cherish all the sweetest times we spent together, all the bestest times ever. Really proud of you for making it into Imperial College medicine. Did you know that when you told me you'd be applying to UK to study, that was early last year.. and I was sad.. But a few seconds later, I had a beautiful leaf fall into my hands. So I made a wish.. That you'd be accepted into your dream uni, even if it meant you going to UK.. I never told you because if i did, the wish wouldn't come true. I'm glad my wish came true :) All the best and bon voyage.. Been spending my entire january with this girl. Gossiping, shopping, pigging out, ICECREAM-pig out, basically everything except working ;) I'm so glad we managed to catch up after 2 years in different jcs. The 3 hour phone conversation from 1am-4am seemed to do the trick. This is the bestest godbrother in the world, with no hair :) This is the bestest real-brother in the world (but that's cos I only have one real brother remember?) on some kiddy ride next to Z-fencing school. Doesn't this make you laugh? Look at my yeye! He always sleeps like this with his mouth wide open! And recently his eyes have been rather red and i asked him why and he said cos he hasnt had enough sleep like me and sleeps at 3am. At the hospital waiting for my dad to wake up after his op. The lovely tulips mummy and i chose for my dad! His op went smoothly, thanks everyone who asked. The canal I run along when I am emo..

I went on a lil shopping spree for valentine's day presents for my family :) Tis's infamous evil grin. She shouldn't be silly shark and me evil piranha. It should be evil shark and cool piranha.=) Rizki terms it the 'happy tree friends' smile. I fully agree. Lovely term. Well she's so gonna kill me with the pic of her sleeping, but at least her FANCLUB of boys can come visit my blog for this picture and i'll get more readers. woohoo! ohmygosh. Imagine this. waking up on a nice sunny morning, thinking it'd be a nice day for a tan or a swim, then walking out of your room rather happily then... -cues dramatic music- OHMYGAWDWHATTHEHELLISTHAT! how can a mummy write something so.. so.. so.. evil in such nice and neat mummy-like-handwriting??? But being the good girl that I am, I changed into sloppiest clothes and tied my hair up and determinedly grabbed the rags and polish and bucket and started work! Look at the bloody antiques! I had to clean every single groove or gap or hole and make sure there wasn't any dust. The table with the mirror was ghastly. Well 1stly, it's the ugliest table i've ever seen in my entire life. And 2ndly.. well, i have no 2ndly. But the 1st point ought to be reason enough to throw that disgusting piece of furniture away. BLEAACK. And if you know just how perfectionistic I am, I spent about 15 minutes on each chair, cleaning the dust, polishing the wood. There's still the living room which I spent about 2 hours in total on, I can't find the picture...

My yeye hung this up. Really pretty isn't it? :) So the job was done at the end of the day. Thoroughly exhausting yet satisfying at the same time. Chatted throughout the day with mari and yeye and nainai. And got lotsa praises from mom tis and ivan. Whoopee! Tired out after the day's work. Look at Ruffles, he's tired too from too much sleep. Heehee. Reunion steamboat dinner with the cousins was really fun! We went a lil crazy cooking the meat at our table. I started the craziness by eating a piece of raw meat under mei's dare, and then she tried some and agreed with me it was nice! Then dorlisa nibbled a little. And guess what? Jolyn slid a gigantic piece into her mouth and swallowed! MYGOSH all of us were shellshocked for a few seconds just staring at the barbaric act. Hahahaaa.

Guess what? My mom told us this plate of abalone costs $100. CAN YOU IMAGINE??? And coming up, sentosa pictures with the elits! What is there to say, but you girls make me happy and I love you :)

MY BOYFRIEND'S BACK FROM INDONESIA! we had helluva good time catching up (about time!) A full entry next, cos all the pictures are in his camera/laptop. But this is a sneak preview: You make my day. You make my world so much more beautiful just by being in it. I love you.

melzki roars

2007-02-22T15:08:00.000+08:00

this is rizki blogging in mel's blog! "it's good to be back! all the green green scenery and especially the merlion and the Singapore Tourism Board created to attract tourists to Singapore, SOOOOOO cool :) Or should I say, SOOOO cook? ANYWAY, it's GREEEAAAAAT to be back because I missed mel SOSO SO SO SO SO SO SO SO SO SO SOSO SO SO SO SO SO SO SO SO SO SOSO SO SO SO SO SO SO SO SO SO SOSO SO SO SO SO SO SO SO SO SO SOSO SO SO SO SO SO SO SO SO SO SOSO SO SO SO SO SO SO SO SO SO SOSO SO SO SO SO SO SO SO SO SO SOSO SO SO SO SO SO SO SO SO SO SOSO SO SO SO SO SO SO SO SO SO SOSO SO SO SO SO SO SO SO SO SO SOSO SO SO SO SO SO SO SO SO SO SOSO SO SO SO SO SO SO SO SO SO SOSO SO SO SO SO SO SO SO SO SO SOSO SO SO SO SO SO SO SO SO SO SOSO SO SO SO SO SO SO SO SO SO SOSO SO SO SO SO SO SO SO SO SO SOSO SO SO SO SO SO SO SO SO SO SOSO SO SO SO SO SO SO SO SO SO SOSO SO SO SO SO SO SO SO SO SO SOSO SO SO SO SO SO SO SO SO SO SOSO SO SO SO SO SO SO SO SO SO SOSO SO SO SO SO SO SO SO SO SO SOSO SO SO SO SO SO SO SO SO SO SOSO SO SO SO SO SO SO SO SO SO SOSO SO SO SO SO SO SO SO SO SO SOSO SO SO SO SO SO SO SO SO SO SO

SO SO SO SO SO SO SO SO SO SO SOSO SO SO SO SO SO SO SO SO SO SOSO SO SO SO SO SO SO SO SO SO SOSO SO SO SO SO SO SO SO SO SO SOSO SO SO SO SO SO SO SO SO SO SOSO SO SO SO SO SO SO SO SO SO SOSO SO SO SO SO SO SO SO SO SO SOSO SO SO SO SO SO SO SO SO SO SOSO SO SO SO SO SO SO SO SO SO SOSO SO SO SO SO SO SO SO SO SO SOSO SO SO SO SO SO SO SO SO SO SOSO SO SO SO SO SO SO SO SO SO SOSO SO SO SO SO SO SO SO SO SO SOSO SO SO SO SO SO SO SO SO SO SOSO SO SO SO SO SO SO SO SO SO SO SO SO SO SO SO SO SO SO SO SO SOSO SO SO SO SO SO SO SO SO SO SOSO SO SO SO SO SO SO SO SO SO

MUCH!

wish us luck for the interview tmr! if it goes well, we can work together!!!

YAY

YAY!!!!

On a more serious note, everyone shall pray for the A'level results. Since it is out of our control right now. "

Mel here:

"Kindly do not sms me at 1245am because I AM SLEEPING! (unless you are rizki) "

2007-02-12T21:55:00.000+08:00

In just 10 hours time.. I'm at a total loss for words. haha.

same 2 faces on different moods

2007-02-09T20:04:00.000+08:00

The next 3 days are gonna be a very long 3 days.. I'm turning into a camera whore thanks to rizki's daily requests for my photos and videos, which is unnecessary since i look the same everyday (hahaha) Almost there honey :) bored-without-you look emo-without-you look okay-without-you-but-could-be-better-with-you-around-look

sympathy pains

2007-02-06T17:14:00.000+08:00

People who know us (me and riz duh) would know how we always fall sick at the same time. But the root cause everyone (including us) attribute it to is because we spend so much time together and share food so germs and viruses are bound to spread. Then explain why we both are having fever, stomach cramps, diarrhoea and flu at the same time when it's physically impossible for the germs/virus to spread so many thousand miles! And how whenever he tells me he has headaches (from too little sleep), I get it too (even when I get enough sleep cos i don't have to work). Shuqi said smth like we share the same heart that's why we both fall sick at the same time. And I was like thinking, rubbish. Where got such thing. So I went to google it and guess what... I found this: sympathy pains When someone you love is in pain and you are in pain because you love them so much. In other words, When the person you love..(your sould mate)..Is in pain..and you are in the same type of pain because you have sympathy for them. My boyfriend and I are sick and having the same symptoms as each other..I think I am having sympathy pains for him. Here's the website: http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=sympathy+pains if you're still cynical. hahaha. Here's a longer website: http://trenchdoc.wordpress.com/2006/09/20/sympathy-pain/ SCARY SIA. P.S: If some assassins want to kill either of us, they just have to kill one of us, the other would prob die. lol New updates: It's 4 more days and 6 more days respectively. Well, time really crawls by when you're sick/can't eat anything except porridge/injured/down. Is it just me or have YOU been acting like a total bitch this week? My hamstring still hurts and it's been 3 days already. (Normally it only hurts up to 2 days after the re-injury) SO. It's a little URGH for me. Riz says he's gonna bring me to this physio in Toa Payoh when he's back. Ms Ling brought him to see that one last time and according to them both it's really gd. Yep. Speaking of which I miss Ms Ling. Sigh. I miss s08 too. Especially xiaohui mavis nani and shuqi. We saw each other so often the past 2 years it's like having a family in nj. Is it just me or does the whole family not give a damn about my hamstring? The chat with dory was awesome albeit crazy. We recalled almost our entire JC lives within that 3 hour conversation. We even pigged out thru the phone and i destroyed her fab diet plan. uh oh. :) Maybe if you were to think back how much concern you showed me when I told you my hamstring hurts, how you went "shut up lah", or how you asked just to check if you had the same injury while not caring about mine, or how you so reluctantly lent me your jacket when i was cold, or how you said it's better without me cos i'm in a bad mood. Maybe if you thot back abt all these you'd understand why i'm starting to feel like i don't belong, and even worse, starting not to give a damn. I'm giving tuition tomorrow, hope I can do a good job.. cos sometimes I think i'm probably more suited to be Effie's babysitter. Sigh.. oh yeah and think about how you reacted when I cldn't even walk and go for ballet. venting your anger (oh yeah deny it but i sensed it) on me and not even showing any slight bit of concern. I need to go shopping for shorts. It's a long story, you can ask Rizki if you want to know. Hahaha. Well, for now, just being sick and alternately knocked out by drowsy medicine and waking to eat disgustingly bland porridge isn't much of a happy lifestyle, so the only thing that brightens my day are Rizki's messages and talking to him and elits and other nicepple online. Our 2007 Resolution says: i'll be eating porridge with you =)

you'll be safe here

2007-02-04T14:25:00.000+08:00

Rizki sent me the lyrics of this song..

You'll Be Safe Here, by Rivermaya

Nobody knows

Just why we're here

Could it be fate

Or random circumstance

At the right place

At the right time

Two roads intertwine

And if the universe conspired

To meld our lives

To make us

Fuel and fire

Then know

Where ever you will be

So too shall I be

Chorus:

Close your eyes

Dry your tears'

Coz when nothing seems clear

You'll be safe here

From the sheer weight

Of your doubts and fears

Weary heart

You'll be safe here

Remember how we laughed

Until we cried

At the most stupid things

Like we were so high

But love was all that we were on

We belong

And though the world would

Never understand

This unlikely union

And why it still stands

Someday we will be set free.

Pray and believe

Chorus:

When the light disappears

And when this world's insincere

You'll be safe here

When nobody hears you scream

I'll scream with you

You'll be safe here

Save your eyes

From your tears

When everything's unclear

You'll be safe here

From the sheer weight

Of your doubts and fears

Wounded heart

When the light disappears

And when this world's insincere

You'll be safe here

When nobody hears you scream

I'll scream with you

You'll be safe here

In my arms

Through the long cold night

Sleep tight

You'll be safe here

When no one understands

I'll believe

You'll be safe,

You'll be safe

You'll be safe here

Put your heart in my hands

You'll be safe here.

So some drama happened. It's abit tiring and... complicated to write about everything, plus those who'd care to read abt it already know. So let's just mention a few random words. Migration. London. Religion. Illegal. Parents. Hahaha. However, it's only through these crazy twisting and turning of events, like an unpredictable series of waterfalls and river rapids that life takes us through, only through these that we find out truly just how strong we are. An old saying goes: "When you're beaten, fallen, bruised, torn apart by circumstances, Remember what brought you here And hold on to it Don't let it go Never let it go." Our stoicism, resilience and determination during all these trying circumstances have shown us we were more solid than we even thought we were. Nani, Shuqi and I had a spontaneous dinner at Cavana! Wow, a new favourite eat-out for me :) With lots of chicken and chiken. Hahahaha. We started ranking how drama the elits' lives are, from most drama to least drama. And concluded I'm the most drama. And Xiaohui is the most Zen person. Hahaha. I must learn how to be more Zen like Xh :) Guess what? Before meeting SQ, Nani and I got stalked by a... STALKER! (how duh is that) He walked towards us, stood a few creepy inches away, scratching his stomach and staring at us rather constipatedly. I was actually more amused than freaked out, until Nani went "Let's go.." and we quickly walked into Causeway Point, and then he followed us for a pretty long time so we kept winding here and there and finally hid in the crowd in 7-Eleven till he went away. Hahaha. And nani walked so fast I was like "Nani wait!!!" SEE. The lesson learnt: In times of crisis, you learn about true friendship. And those friends who desert you in times of crisis by walking SUPER DUPER FAST. HAHAHAHA. Kidding lah. If not for nani we'd both be alot more traumatized. OH, guess what, after SQ set off home, Nani dragged me to "a mat-filled stadium" at Woodlands where a football match was going on. It was pretty boring.

One guy's eyeball fell out and he called for his mommy.
The ambulance came and thought Nani was the casualty, and she shouted "Do I look like I NEED help??!"
We walked past the male toilet on the way out from the female toilet, and I shoved Nani almost into the toilet and she was super happy!

Okay. One out of the 3 statements above is true, and the other 2 are false. Happy guessing! :) I sent Tran off to Vietnam. Her month's worth of adventures in London and Germany are really exciting! Like how she spent an entire day travelling from North to East to West to South of Germany thanks to the snowstorm and train-schedule-malfunction. Hahaha. And her stories of her cousins and cousin's cousins are really funny. She showed me pictures from her laptop, her cousin's toddler is SUPER CUTE! Mixed blood kids always have a really unique look. Anyways, we had alot of fun but she had to go in soon.. :( Hope my 4 page letter made her cry on the plane. HAHAHAHAHA. Hey if you're reading my blog, pls update your blog! So John and Gh very enthusiastically arranged an extremely spontaneous outing. You could call it a GP-tuition-class outing, minus Janice and the twins and Yongshan and the-jerk-of-the-century. Heh. Well, it started off with all 3 of us at different corners of Topshop with phone connection malfunctions and hunting for each other the primitive way. Next came my shock, which I forgot to mentally prepare myself for... Guohou's hair! Or should I say, lack of hair. HAHAHA. I laughed for an entire minute straight! Then came the distracted hunting for seats while more focused on talking to each other. And the taking turns buying of food,followed by Gh's hilarious NS stories, some horrifying ones which made me really glad Rizki's not Singaporean and doesn't have to go to NS (hahaha). BUT! I have to say this, I know he'd be strong enough to go thru NS if he has to, just glad he doesn't have to, you know? And then John's equally hilarious stories of his Primary 1 students, which somehow led to Gh suanning me nonstop :( Hahaha. Then to John's workplace where we started fooling ard with handcream and being fascinated like 3 year old kids. (haha) We were saying how time flies cos it seemed just a few weeks ago we were in GP tuition wrecking havoc and whacking YS with Nat. Day clappers and arguing the most warped theories and taking our own sweet time to do AQs and throwing pencaps at each other. Hahaha! I didn't realise it, but I've missed them! So it was nice to be able to meet up again. Fencing has been getting easier yet tougher at the same time. Easier cos of the instalment of muscle memory, but tougher cos of the newer things we're learning and addition of timed-trials speed and agility, plus higher expectations from coaches as time goes by. I finally got my fencing shoes yesterday! :) It was a huge sense of happiness somehow, I don't know exactly why, but maybe cos my current blue-silver adidas shoes are totally the opposite of what fencers require. Hahaha! It's super wide, super thick, and the heel is bulky and not sloping. Which is why I felt this jump of jubilance in getting my fencer shoes :) Baaaad news. For me. My hamstring feels strained ("Not again?!") Yep, again. *very sian look* Can't walk properly today. SIGH. I already sensed something was wrong during the stretching at the start of lesson when I felt my muscles in that area more tense than usual. That was probably result of my emo 2 hour jog at the canal :( When you're emo you don't remember to stretch before running you see. You just take off with your mp3 and go crazy. Hahaha. Anw, it was so deja vu when Coach Vino stretched my leg like how Coach Suzanne did last jan when I first injured it. At least it didn't hurt as crappily so I don't think the re-injury's that serious. Thanks Rizki for being there for me, like you always have. :) When no one else physically around me seems to care.. Ballet's being going up and down. Poise, movements and precision of steps is something drilled into me, and strength is building gradually back again. But my flexibility poses a huge problem, cause with the recent tension in my muscles I don't really dare to push myself to my limits incase I overstretch and damage anything further. Talentime got the Elits pretty emo. I won't write about it here.. Well, 11th feb is coming real soon ok? :) Speaking of 11th feb, there's a GGS SMRT Cram Jam intended to break a SG records to enter into the book of records! How often do you get to be crammed into a taxi/bus while getting media attention? HAHAHA. Go for it, those who are participating, I'll be... there watching. Haha, anticlimax right. I've been getting really forgetful and blur these days. Like how I directed a woman towards Orchard (I was also heading towards Orchard), then took the train the opposite wrong direction to Cityhall before wanting to slap myself awake and taking the train back. HAHA. And lots more examples I don't wish to publicize and malu myself further. Hahaha. Plus, freakily enough, if you ask me on saturday, "So how was your week?" I'd stare at you blankly cause I've simply no recollection of my week. Actually.. truth is, I've always been like that. STM (short term memory) HAHAHA. So I'd have to refer to my blog entries to remember how my week went and what I did for each day of the week. But somehow starting from the time I knew Rizki, I found my memory sharper and clearer, like a camera that got upgraded from a 1 megapixel to a 100megapixel! HAHAHA. Serious. And then I could remember everything I did the entire week, even if we didn't spend the day together, I'd remember cause I'd tell him about my day in detail like a process of making myself remember. Hahaha. Well then, I probably got too used to the feeling of being able to remember things clearly for some time, that I'm feeling abit disoriented and lost these days. I've got to constantly remind myself not to be blur and absent-minded and be more focused when doing things. All I need now is patience, because sometimes when you really need someone to be here, like right next to you, are the times when time crawls by agonizingly slow, while mocking and laughing at you for not cherishing the times in the past enough to reap and sow the seeds of karma, albeit in a passive sense. "I need you to feel like myself again.." How true..

complicated

2007-02-01T10:55:00.000+08:00

If you think your life is complicated, you don't want to know about mine... It's so complicated that complicated isn't even close to describing how complex it is.

You'll be in my heart

2007-01-30T12:57:00.000+08:00

I just had the most terrible day yesterday! Super bad cramps despite panadol (since morning till early afternoon) followed by continuously having something wrong with my internet on all 3 comps- my laptop, tis's laptop and ivan's desktop. ARGHHHH. it wouldn't matter that much if not for the fact riz was online. then at night, i came down with super bad flu. like sneezing non-stop and my nose running non-stop too. couldn't get to sleep too and was upset my parents didn't tuck me in when i was sick. (hahaha) but after rizki stayed up to make sure i was ok.. i felt really warm and happy inside. Plus alot better. guess it wasn't that terrible a day afterall :) it's 14 more days! :) wow, we've survived almost 2 months apart.. "You'll Be In My Heart" by Phil Colins Come stop your crying It will be all right Just take my hand Hold it tight I will protect you from all around you I will be here Don't you cry For one so small, you seem so strong My arms will hold you, keep you safe and warm This bond between us Can't be broken I will be here Don't you cry 'Cause you'll be in my heart Yes, you'll be in my heart From this day on Now and forever more You'll be in my heart No matter what they say You'll be here in my heart, always Why can't they understand the way we feel They just don't trust what they can't explain I know we're different but, deep inside us We're not that different at all And you'll be in my heart Yes, you'll be in my heart From this day on Now and forever more Don't listen to them 'Cause what do they know We need each other, to have, to hold They'll see in timeI know When destiny calls you You must be strong I may not be with you But you've got to hold on They'll see in time I know We'll show them together 'Cause you'll be in my heart Yes, you'll be in my heart From this day on, Now and forever more Oh, you'll be in my heart No matter what they say You'll be in my heart, always Always

This is family

2007-01-25T12:20:00.000+08:00

This is family. with some of the ridiculous the spastic and most unglam moments you'll ever see :) note the resemblance between certain photos and the animal photo below it :)

brown girl in the rain

2007-01-21T21:19:00.000+08:00

OMG. my life's gotten really exciting recently. with ballet (we went for trial and mr fan said we can skip grade 7 to go to grade 8! (: ) it felt so surreal cos the last time we danced was EXACTLY 3 years ago (which was grade 6), yet we could still catch up on the grade 7 steps and it felt pretty natural! actually, the happiest thing is that tis and i still felt the passion :) fencing (fencing so rocks! i cant believe i used to think it was boring. my coach says i'm doing gd! oh, and coach vino is a southeast asia fencing champion of 2006! omg. ) but it's SUPER TIRING. seriously. it's worse than softball training even though it's only like 2 hours per trng. and the PT is like all the toughest parts of coach suzanne's PT combined together. after trg can feel my legs shaking (that was aft the first lesson). tiredness and muscle aches and crazy-requirements-of-flexibility-aside, it's really fun! the 3 coaches have a good sense of humour and yet are strict on us at the same time. really can't wait to get our full sparring gear! sword and helmet and protective suit and all :) and drumming! (tis and i rented the studio today and she taught me so much and a quote from her "jie is very good" and "you're a natural pro" :) (really ego grin) i think i'm really gonna take up proper drum lessons at the thomson studio! :) plus the endless "cheap dates" dory and i go out on. let me explain the concept of a "cheap date". it's when one or both of you are broke and have to plan totally budgeted or otherwise zero-spending dates. hahaha. it's cool having a best friend who totally understands your financial situation and fits your plans. hahaha. and helping out with ny guides (well, we didn't get to help out much, but we definitely will when the proper testwork/training commences!) and talking to juniors, perhaps scaring the hell out of juniors when we're trying to be friendly (really.) shrugs. we have no idea why they're so scared of us, like scurrying around us and greeting us like every few seconds. (grimaces) maybe cause we're pretty ancient as j3s. (aww man i feel old!) well, this may sound retarded, but my first day at work at agnes office really was quite fun! folding tshirts, sorting receipts and doing other admin stuff (oh my she takes like up to 5 cabs a day?!). oh, except the part i got scolded like crazy by alot of crazy people on the phone when i was trying to do business with them. hahaha. some screamed at me to speak chinese (uhhh, how would i know that's their preferred language? i'm not a machine where you "press 1 for english" etc) some hung up in my midsentence. some even thought i was prank calling them! basically, 9 out of 10 calls i made reached really rude people, fax machines, or nobody picked up! my god. other than that, the funnest part was printing the tshirts! operating the machine is scary, tough yet fun! agnes says i have bull's strength. WAHAHAHAH. OH AND I'M GONNA BE AN ENVENTURE LEGION CAMP TRAINER! :) (excited) it's not really the pay that attracts me, more of the camping and outdoors. hahaha. plus learning even more abt the outdoors and running camps which i can't wait to do from the pro-er pple. :) here, check it out: http://www.enventure.com.sg/ (see agnes i help you publicize k) oh yes. and my newest interest in the korean series: Princess Hours. which totally doesn't fail to crack me up cos the main character's so spastic! She's like the queen-to-be but behaving in a totally retarded, crazy manner and not adhering to the court protocol or whatever. hahaha. My parents bought alot of korean series recently! Princess Hours, My Girl, Winter Sonata and more.. watching DVDs has a new element when i've lots of time and scroll through the special features (which can take another 1 or 2 hours).. of the making of The Matrix, or Mean Girls.. in case you didn't know, i'm really interested in film-making except the impracticalities of it. my pay per week is $40, which is the exact same as my allowance should have been. (i'm still not getting any allowance from my parents), so I can pretty much just barely pay for my prepaid card supply and have enough for the occasional outings each week! my parents aren't too keen on me working, so i'm just gonna wait till the results are out to take an appropriate internship. Anyway, i love clapping dancing and singing in the car with my whole family to the Daddy Cool play songs! "Brown girl in the rain" and "Holiholiday" and "Daddy Cool" and "Sonny" and "Rivers of Babylon" are our fav songs! OABM definitely has reached a new level of pro-ness during their disney concert perf! my dad videoed the whole thing, so i'm gonna show it to rizki when he gets back :) the songs really suited celle's vocals, and FINALLY i took picture with the whole of cellie's angels (always one of them missing!) ahahaha. i really can't wait for indon lessons to begin (26th feb!). and i'm gonna go back to bishan park guides to instruct them! (though my term has already ended, it doesn't really make a difference to me) OHKAY. so my point is.. THIS IS THE LIFE. Not just the life, but THE life. HAHAHAHA. Now all that's missing.. is a boy. His name is Rizki. So anyway, i'm not gonna bore everyone with details of how rizki's internet has this super huge virus or how we keep meeting difficulties with calling/smsing/going online (technical difficulties) so i'm just gonna summarize. we've been really strong these 6 weeks. really really strong. and we're gonna keep getting stronger.. not i get stronger and he gets stronger only but we get stronger as one, you know. so there's so many "stronger" in this para i'm gonna start a new para. hahaha. so my point is, i really really REALLY miss rizki. more than i'd ever imagined. i knew it'd be hard being apart, but then nothing could prepare me for what actually happened. which happened. which is still happening. let's just say our relationship is on another level now. :) i can't say how much i look forward to that day he comes back.. but i kinda realised something. that it doesn't matter that much when he comes back, be it 2 weeks, or 4 weeks, or 6 weeks.. cos i'm gonna love him more every single day.. *smiles* i swear it's happening :) the next para's gonna be pretty mushy, so if you can't stand mushy stuff, please don't read on and close my blog immediately from this point onwards. ----> . <------ (the point) i can't wait for you to come back.. i can't wait for us to sit down the whole day like we always do.. and just talk about anything under the sun (or moon like you wrote in our journal if it's at night) and really tell each other properly what we've missed out being apart (you know msn convos aren't too good at telling funny stories, or the drama ones). i can't wait to give you all the hugs i wanted to give you every single day i've missed you.. i can't wait for us to go out and eat together as usual.. you're right, meals are really hundred times better when with you. :) i can't wait to give you a kiss for every single time you've been there for me when i was down.. every single time you've stayed up and slept barely 2 or 3 hours before going to work.. all for me. I can't wait to tell you all the things i should have said before you left but never did.. and most of all.. I can't wait to take all your troubles away.. I love you hon :)

Fever, I'm hot, I can't be stopped.

2007-01-12T13:17:00.000+08:00

So I'm down with a fever. :( Since my parents abruptly decided to STOP giving me allowance (upon discovering I've been spending it mostly on weekly prepaid cards after my hp got confiscated), which means I've no money with effect from this very moment, I felt kinda screwed. SO. Although they prefer me not to work, that's the only choice I have at this very moment. Unless I want to rob steal or borrow. But since I'm still rather ethical despite the desperation, I decided working shall be my solution. SO. I've found about 3 job possibilities, and even considering taking the students even if it means going to their place to tutor them. Will my parents freak out? Yes. Do they hold the legal right to stop me as an almost-adult? I'm not too sure. Do they hold the moral authority to stop me given they've cut my allowance and left me with no financial support? I don't think so. So after being really down for awhile last night. Reasons being: I met a lizard (I'm terrified of lizards.) I had to stand thru out a total of 1.5 hour bus journey in which there was hardly any space to breathe and the floor was wet and gross. I'm still having cold war with my sis. I was drenched and cold and shivering from the continuous raining yesterday. The rain totally dampens my mood especially if I'm alone. Rizki's comp has a virus and is being sent for repair for a week so I can't talk to him for a week or so. The whole allowance drama. The whole feeling like i'm neither here nor there, not a teenager and not an adult. The struggle between pride and dependence. I finally got my act together at about 11pm+ after Rizki managed to cheer me up miraculously through a few of his smses. And planned my action plan. HAHAHA. So proud of myself. -grins- I'm gonna miss lazing around the house doing nothing in particular though. I practised piano this morning, followed by talking to my dog (her name is Rusty and it's a SHE, not HE for alot of my friends who keep assuming all dogs are "he"s) and I wanted to go cycle around the neighbourhood but it's still raining and anyway I think I'm still feverish :( K. I'm gonna fill in the IRAS application now. Yesterday's plan didn't work too well. But we'll try again won't we? I hope you two won't be too demoralised, it's afterall the first attempt. And I'll be there for you both if you need k? You know that (: So after our plan failed, we rather soberly walked to Darren's apartment and continued watching our VCD there. Then played daidee, bluff and speed which I all won (crazy-competitive-monica-like-smile) Man, losers lah the two of them. Oh, and Ruffles met G-bear (what a name!) who belongs to SQ, and Darren played a few of his songs on his guitar for us. It was the first time I heard him after hearing so much about his playing from Shuqi (gushing more like it :p) Shuqi said last time he was nervous cos she said I was going to "assess" his talent. Then again, I think darren was totally scared of everything about me last time after the incident i kinda threatened him outside the schoolgate. Heh. His voice is really good for an untrained singer! He knows abt 100 songs in total (like OMG) My fav of all the songs he sang ytd was the spanish one! Cos it was fast and lively and he pronounced the spanish words so pro-ly! Seriously. He said he just "figured it out" himself. (like OMG again..) Oh, and when he sang the songs from the "special folder" reserved for shuqi, she BLUSHED! (like OMG for the 3rd time) Her face was really all red. I thought she'd have been used to it by now. Haha! And she covered her face with a cushion. Until G-bear and Ruffles started swaying to the music then she was fine. Hahahahaha. I think I sound really incoherent now but nevermind lah huh? I had a fab lunch with my mom ytd. That was before she happily announced my dad wants to cut my allowance off. :( She went with me to SMU to enquire the law fac there. Being the pioneer law batch there sounds good cos of many reasons :) We had to walk a long long time in the rain and our shoes were soaked :( My mom rocks. Yay. Oh, and just because Rizki's not in Singapore doesn't mean I'll say yes to a date. So you can stop bloody asking me. And you too. What pricks. Oooh lala. Writing a resume is easy. HAHAHA. Byebye. I miss Rizki.

Plans for the next 2 months :)

2007-01-08T11:22:00.000+08:00

Here's a quick update I've been spending my days in a weird cycle of sleeping at 3am and waking at 2pm. And my whole family's not too happy with me cos they think i've been chatting with some strangers online. Well. Why hello stranger! -grins at rizki- Hahaha. Uh. I'm gonna take up ballet again, and fencing too. I realised it's super fun after joining in the trial lesson at United Square! :) My mom: so are you all keen? Dad: We can all join as a family! Me: great. A family which can ALSO fight physically. *rolls eyes* hahaha. I've yet to bring ivan to watch deathnote, I'll bring him on tuesday or wednesday. OH WOW I AM SO PROUD OF IVAN. He got into Acsi softball team! (: The WHOLE SCHOOL tried out (it's compulsory to try out every sport) and only abt 20 got in! YAY. And he rushed back excitedly looking rather sunburnt to tell me all the details of his first training! And even used that to make me go swimming with him! Hahaha. Rizki's super happy when he heard that too, he's gonna lend ivan his glove in march :) (Mine's kinda out of shape abit) Hahaha. I went for a 'job interview' with dorinda ytd at SGCC. Looks pretty optimistic! Think we'll get a job there soon! The boss was friendly and all. And there was this muhd who kept asking us why we wanna work here and saying we should go work at kino instead. Hahaha. He's super friendly, but just really funny the way he comments abt the place and his boss. "my boss ah, very friendly guy ah.. especially to ladies" HAHAHA. His boss was so nearby! MOST EXCITINGLY OF ALL, I'm no longer secretly learning indon, cos I signed up for this NUS Indon course. Wow it costs $610!! My mom's so supportive. I printed and filled in the form super neatly and I'm gonna mail it like in an hour's time! :D SO EXCITED. My course starts 26th feb though. Anyone wants to attend class with me? :) It's a 10 week course, twice a week, 2.5 hours each. -grins- At first I wanted to trick Rizki but then I realised he knows my whereabouts like 24/7, so it's kinda hard to trick him. Hahaha. OH. And this is a very important announcement. I officially cannot hug anyone for the next 2 months. Hahaha. Cos I'm hugging Rizki for 2 months and I'm not supposed to let go :p I don't want to anyway. I hugged him last night and I didn't let go since then :D If it doesn't make sense to you, then TOO BAD, just don't hug me. HAHAHAHA. I sound so antisocial. And abit schizo. And a few days ago I couldn't spell schizo I spelt it as scizo. IT WAS A TYPO. TYPO. -looks cross- hahahaha. I'm going for octos chalet now! BARBEQUE! -drools- My pretty drop dead gorgeous friends! -drools even more- I can eat them up if the food Kangwei catered isn't enough. -throws back evil head in evil laughter- HAHAHAHA. -still shaking in evil laughter- OKAY. I'm gonna bring Ruffles. And this is a dire warning to all. Who dares steal Ruffles shall have to be banned from eating Ruffles chips their entire life! Followed by a dunking in the sea :) -grins the evil smile again- Awww. Ruffles misses Rizki. He says I sleep alot and always squash him to death while sleeping. Hahaha. Whereas Rizki always lets him watch cool stuff like Prince of Tennis or CSI. :( Sobs. Whyyyy. Why does Ruffles like Rizki more than me.. -tragic sob- It's unbelievable how many tuition requests I've gotten just by recmmendations. Word of mouth is indeed powerful huh. But also unbelievable how many I've to turn down thanks to my parents not allowing me to go over to students' house to tuition them. ARGH. Anyone needs a job let me know k? ANYWAY. -evillest and most mysterious grin of all- I'm working on a secret project! HAHAHA. Rizki knows. Hope I get it launched. YAY. Meanwhile. Asswipe doesn't deserve my friendship Thanks to constant accusations of my "inflated sense of self" and the attempted tearing apart of my relationship with Rizki. Note, i said ATTEMPTED. Not successful, asswipe. And oh whatever, he doesn't even matter that much for me to blog abt him in detail. -__- Besides, it doesn't mean that just cos you're lawyer you're gonna win all the time. Not in friendship. It feels surreal.. when we both ran out of words.. ran out of breath ran out of the ways we could express ourselves but we knew exactly what the other person felt I knew what you'd say what you were gonna say even before you said it :) Hahaha it's really happening hon.

and in this dream I was dancing right beside you (:

2007-01-02T16:41:00.000+08:00

Here's lots of randomest photos :) dory and i when we were sec 4 chieh and i when we were sec 4 i'm gonna miss you bitch :( the wonderful cellie's angels minus cellie. HAHAHA. so let's call them mel's angels. thanks for the flowers you guys. (: gorgeous girls in white ;) me evelyn and clemmie this is me at my sec 4 grad night! with someone really special :) my batch and i at nygg camp 2004 i was in a grumpy mood apparently. ms ling and mr tham! this is koped from their wedding album :D sherinah the sexy babe ;) but rather ego too. heh. here's my favourite bimbo, mich (: here's pinkotic pinko and bimbotic bimbo (nicknames given affectionately by our 'dear' pw leader kangwei) Nia and I. she helped me survive the entire year of boring gp lessons :) DROP CHEM GANG! or rather, stay-in-canteen-and-eat-prata-gang ;) here is just how gay the softball guys look -___- me and wendy my ex-throwing-partner! too bad i didn't bring the froggy shirt :( froggy and fly :) oh! and humphrey. heeeheee. us trying to fix the fridge door which came off -___-" The infamous godbro guohou, me and rizki :) SCANDALOUS!!!!!! my evil sis ganging up with lauren and MY VERY OWN BOYFRIEND (the photographer) to kick me!! why couldn't i have a sister who likes playing with barbies?? there, the evil collaboration. it's not the first time they've ganged up against me :( National Library Gang :D Me and my 4 year old friend Samuel :) HAHAHA. I'll miss going "4 year olds are meant to be seen and not heard!" And he'll go "5 year old are... are... are.. not much better!" HAHAHA. Here's da famous and wonderful nj046 group leader and one of my closest friends, kangwei, who doesn't fit into any group cos he's not in the elits -__-" elits. sexiest most brilliant girls i've ever known ;) keep kicking ass alright? me and tran, hope she gets into Cambridge! my favourite phone partner, we can chat for hours! hahaha. oh, besides rizki ofcourse :p the person i always fight over the field for. hahaha, soccer capt xinyi. softball seniors without lydia (who we spent 15 min hunting for!!) the best sister one could ask for (besides the evil endeavours) NJ046 :) apri and i. not extremely close to him, but i decided to put up our picture cos he's going to switzerland to study hotel management and i don't think i'll see him for my whole life again :( s08 will miss you! This is how Riz and I got to know each other around october last year :) nice right the banner? the people who saved me from chilli padi attack. hahaha. hahahaha. Hey you! "Who me?" Yes you. You're mine :)

EUROPE TRIP I decided to skim past the entire Europe Trip cos it's simply too long to write about! All in all we had fun, moving from hotel to hotel like fugitives, sharing humongous portions of food in classy restaurants, hopping on and off the london tube, skipping down the roads hand in hand singing "Here we come to save the day" in english and a badly-translate-version-of-chinese, sitting for hours on the bus travelling across country borders listening to our terrible tourguide (we nicknamed Spoonie cos of the amounts of spoons she gives us) read from her paper, from Winsor Castle to the Stonehenge to Bath in tow with David, our very enthusiastic Eton and Cambridge educated local tourguide who is now a teacher doing a part time job, drowning in snow at the Swiss Alps and almost getting blown away by the crazy helicopters, waiting at Buckingham palace for the queen to appear, going crazy and high at Paris Disneyland and daring each other to take the scariest rides having a snowball fight outside our hotel which resulted in Ivan's very wet mittens and him afterward accidentally scorching it while trying to blowdry it, then crying over his injured mitten for half an hour -___- going to madame tussad's wax museum and taking pictures with brad pitt and orlando bloom and tom cruise and beckam... wax statues, and doing funny poses like kicking saddam hussein. HAHAHA. eating at planet hollywood where my dad, tis and i went crazy and high, i think it was the atmosphere. heh. shopping along champs elysee, the biggest and most glamarous shopping district in the entire paris!! going to the lourve and feeling inspired by art and the events of history.. it was really surreal and beautiful! going punting at the town of cambridge (my whole family agrees i am the proest! *grins grins grins*) and listening to that college boy's stories of the colleges! seeing how a cuckoo clock is made in switzerland (really cool how they make the cuckoo sounds) shopping at the christmas market and ivan going "it's really disturbing!" -points to a creepy elf- going to the lion stone monument which commemorated the deaths of the soldiers who died in wars the street fest where everyone was dressed up in costumes like cakes, bees etc! there was a guy dressed as a girl! seeing the infamous london bridge, tower bridge, eiffel tower, mona lisa etc etc.. and the ministry of justice and the UN and oh! NOTRE DAME! Here's an extract from my euro journal I wrote to Rizki: Well hon, we went on a Paris tour with a local tourguide today. Her name is Frita and she's really good! We just saw Notre Dame, Buckingham palace, London Bridge and Tower bridge..The queen wasn't at Buckingham palace, she went to Winsor Castle, so we were disappointed not being able to see her famous wave from the balcony. It was amazing seeing the bridge disconnect and lift up- tower bridge i mean. To allow this boat (a really tiny boat but with a super tall mast) to pass. We could see the road infront of us lift up and cover our view of the opposite side, then go down again. HAHAHA. While we were driving thru london bridge, one of the girls in the group- Cheryl age 12 started singing "London bridge is falling down!" And everyone was like "eh can sing after we pass the bridge or not.." HAHAHAHA. And when we were in Notre Dame, we started talking about the Hunchback of notre dame cartoon.. we watched the Part2 on disney channel in spore before we left for the airport.. It was super lame, with Quasi moto shouting "I love Madeline!" (his girlfriend in Part2) and Madeline shouted "And I love Quasi moto!" from the bell tower. Hahaha. Then we kept joking, "I love Madeline!" And madeline would shout "I love Madeline too!", or "I love Madeline!" And a voice from the crowd would go "I love Madeline too!" And the past few days i've been telling ivan stories on Desperate Housewives and Deathnote.. And this part in Desperate Housewives had one part Susan said "And I love Mike" when her current boyfriend Ron said "I love you" to her. HAHAHA. So another version goes: "I love Madeline!" "And I love Mike!" it a really girly-susan-like voice. HAHAHA. 3 of us were laughing hysterically with all this.. "I love Madeline!" "And I love Quasi moto-rola 7650i!" Well, all our nonsense lah. The best parts of the trip: The food, the hotels, spending time with my family, did i mention the food? Haha. The friendly locals (in paris and london especially), the relaxed atmosphere, the smooth and unstressful traffic, the brilliant choreography in the play we watched Daddy Cool (which had an entire pole dancing scene, like omg), the lights and bustling atmosphere in Paris, the laidback and crisp london air, and the very neutral switzerland ground (hehe), plus the interesting shops we came across, like a fudge store, a totally-chocolate store, a leaning crooked store, and the 99p store! CHRISTMAS WITH THE FAMILY My christmas with the family was great. This year, the 2 out of 4 families from my dad's side went to china together (and koped my grandpa with them :( ) over christmas. So we had a pretty tiny celebration, just my family, a few christmas videos, our wonderful christmas deco, and a delicious dinner consisting of ham, applesauce, minnestrone soup and i can't remember what else :p OH! my mom's newest experiment dessert, a fruit crepe tart thingy, which tastes great =) What I like about Christmas is that, it isn't just one day, or two days. It lasts like a stretch of like 10 days for my family. All the way till school reopens. We'll be eating chocolates and christmas candy and the ham will find a way to last 10 days as well (except we'll be eating smaller and smaller portions everyday :p) and watching midnight movies like Christmas Carol and The Phantom of the Opera.. I was really impressed with the Phantom of the Opera. I now crown it one of my favouritest movies ever. The acting, singing, music, props, stage setting, lightings, dancing, emotions, plotline.. Everything is fantastic! My mom was hilarious. She fell asleep at the start of Christmas Carol and then woke up so accurately when the credits were rolling! My mom: Huh?? What happened?? My dad and 3 of us: laugh so she insisted on watching the Phantom of the Opera, but she fell asleep and woke up at selective parts. HAHAHA. CHRISTMAS AND COUNTDOWN WITH THE EXTENDED FAMILY So countdown was even more hilarious. Since my dearest cousins were overseas then, we celebrated Christmas during countdown. Hahaha. The usual presents exchange and PLUS shaking everyone's hand to wish them "Merry Christmas" then "Happy new year" then thanking each other for gifts and laughing over the silliest things like how my small aunt always goes to Watsons to buy gifts and this year she bought us this eye massager which you plug into your computer and it'll massage your eyes when you are looking into the computer. HAHAHA. And we recalled how the past few years she got us this makeup kit, then this tattoo kit.. and the other parents always scolded her for giving this kind of presents, so an eye massager shd be safe enough huh? :) And how joshua got upset cos my 3rd uncle gave him a smaller size shirt than ivan. HAHAHA. Somebody wants to be a tough big macho boy huh! Then I pretended to be the Christmas ghost and brought all Tis, Dorlisa and Ivan onto a trip to the past present and future.. HAHAHAHA. Dorlisa and I were trying to come up with logical reasons how come when we were young presents seemed to take much longer to open, and we concluded we were 1) lousy at opening wrappers, cos we'd take like half an hour to open each 2) very very sweet and cute and kept thanking the person who gave us the present, by running to them and giving them like a hug or smth, not like now we sit there and yell "thank you ___! i love it!" HAHAHA. then that got us imitating our tiny voices when we were young, which sounded so chip and dale like we all cracked up laughing like crazy.. Well, all in all christmas this year was really fun :) Countdown too. HAHAHA. Oh, thanks to those who wrote me cards, thanks for the presents, thanks for the christmas messages, the new year messages and most of all, to everyone I had the honour to have the presence of this season :) Iceskating newbie Other than that, some random events would be that my mom, tis, ivan and I went iceskating. It was all of our first time, except Tis. HAHAHA. So at first it was terrifying cos of all the horror stories of iceskating my mom told me when I was younger to prevent me from going without her knowing -___- but then after awhile I kinda got the hang of it so I could glide alone. Hahaha. I fell 4 times in total in 4 hours, that's not too bad eh? But I was cramping slightly so couldn't continue any longer :( Badminton Toa Payoh I played badminton with my 3 kickass cousins from my mom's side. Kelvin Kahwai and Kahmeng. They're all really pro, except for kelvin (hehehe.. hope he doesn't read my blog..) And we played for almost 3 hours straight without realising! Man. Time really passes fast when you're having fun! I almost smashed,- almost. They said it's like a smash but needs a little more power. Hahaha. YAY. Dorlisa teach me how to smash!! DORLISAA!!!! DORLISSSSAAAAAA!!! HAHAHAHA. Octos Christmas Party It was kinda messaaaye at first thanks to my 'wonderful' food coordination, it ended up like - well, this is a quote from sherinah's blog. HAHAHA. OCTOS XMAS PARTY AT MILOMEL'S HOUSE!!!!DATE: 27 DECEMBER 2006, WEDNESDAY As usual, i was late. heh heh. But quite earli by my own standards, coz onli late by 15mins. hahaha. Had loads of fun la. Like SERIOUSLY!!! :) :) :) Wen we first went to her house, (which is situated at some ulu corner called Lorong Batawi =) ) all of us ate salad. Den ate fruit. I tell u, it was like some Healthy Lifestyle Meet at her house. And her house is soooooooo biggg!!! And so beautifully decked out wif decorations of all colours and sizes! =) And junk food was prevalent at her house man. Seriously. hehehe. Den one by one everybdy came. Played the number game, took e prizes out of my hat....... HAHA! Told you my house deco rawks! They kept laughing cos i didn't know how to switch on my own christmas lights, and the tiny little house lit up (the one we bought from Switzerland) HAHA. Well, at least I keep my guests healthy with all da fruits everyone brought ;) OH! We had 3 log cakes thanks to some great miscommunication so we ended up eating and eating like pigs.. HAHAHA. I was in a lazy mood, so at first I was a good host bringing pple around, but subsequently got bored and kept bossing kangwei to do this and that (haha) thank you to the random ppl who helped me out (xh, mav, kw, shuqi, pris, soks) :D We had quite alot of fun exchanging the presents using the number game (Haha!) and guessing the presents even before opening the wrapper! :) I can't coordinate the number game, i'm too blur for that. THE WORD IS "BLUR" NOT "BIMBO"!!!!!! HAH. We all cursed kangwei cos of the number of "Miss a turn" lots he put into the lots.. HAHAHA. And how some of us had telepathy to guess the most unguessable number like immediately. Everything else was pretty much a blur, we just talked and talked and ate icecream + fruits + random junk food galore. And ruffles joined in but... HE GOT SECRETLY STOLEN BY MICHELLE THE BIMBO!!! -gasp- the flowers all look so cute though :) The end I got kinda emo cos Rizki messaged me that he had fever and I got really worried.. Thanks mav and shuqi for being there. -hugs- CAN'T WAIT FOR CHALET GUYS!! :) 8TH TO 10TH JAN, WHICH IS LIKE REAL SOON!! hahaha. Elits lunch at Pizza Hut So the title kinda explains itself. HAHAHA. We first got the shock from seeing xh's new hairstyle, go to xh's blog http://thehoipolloi.blogspot.com or mav's blog http://paper-boat.blogspot.com to see the picture! HAHAHAHA. Daring and shocking, but pretty nice (: So we had lunch at pizza hut, which as usual involved talking about all sorts of randomest things, knowing us. We were having fun so we didn't want to go yet.. so... we took a walk to Fort Canning! Hahaha. Again, i'm lazy to write everything so here's an extract from Mav's blog: ELITS LUNCH at ps pizzahut! after which mel brought us through an ulu route to fort canning. we had to enter parkmall and go down to some carpark and exit by the carpark? then we climbed this narrow stairs behind a gate up to the top of a...fort? it reminded me of "king of the castle" and how hooper and kingshaw climbed up. then hooper went humji and he peed!! hahaha "i'm the king of the castle, you're the dirty rascal!".. oh and i remember that kingshaw spouted profanities at the top of the castle?? hahah i digress. on the way down nani was going "ahhh!" every step she decended upon. it was either the steepness of the steps or her heels. xh was even smarter, she took off her 1000-inch heels. WHY WHY WHY i ponder. why heels? the bane and boon of every woman. i kept laughing at them cos i could easily run and jump in my fake birkenstocks. but i know, deep down, the days of the heels are impending.after that we sat somewhere and talked. i calculated. we spent 3 hours together including the meal but it felt so long! there was never ending topics and laughter. and the stupid circle of secrecy that i forgot who came up with. it's really stupid okay. but i'm sworn to secrecy so i can't tell. ;) we're meeting at kap on friday! now mel is talking to me in indon and rizki is talking to me in chinese and im going madjacks!!! HAHAHAHA. When a convo starts like this: paperboat says: hello paperboat says: are you sane already? It usually isn't a good sign. HAHAHAHAHAHAHA. Finally went out with Dory We last met not too long ago but there was much to update anyways.. HAHAHA. We had lunch at swensens in town, and we wanted to bug mrs oon but it was too late and i had to go home. Haha! I was kinda jetlaggy then and not too great company, sorry :S But let's meet up again soon with chieh and i promise i'll be more awake this time! HAHAHA. My godbro Guohou came over that day! I can't rmb which day.. Hahaha. He went all the way to kovan to get me bubble tea cause he had this impression I was grounded at home! HAHAHA. I believe what I said was "V sian at home but dun feel like going out" and he took it to mean I was grounded -___- But bubbletea's good anyways (: YAY. And I got chocolates from him too! But best of all, I got a juicy story on his life, hahaha it's hilarious but I can't tell! So sorry folks. And I got to complain to him about the asshole too. Which I mentioned in one of my recent entries! HAHA. Ok, here's cheers to 12 years of friendship! RIZKI HONEY I miss Rizki like crazy. So much that I can't even begin to express how much I miss him.. and how nobody would really understand except him anyway.. how there's this ache in my chest all the time since we've been apart.. like something's been taken away and it's missing.. and how the ache gets worse when i'm emo.. Funnily enough, I thot I was imagining things.. Until he asked me if I felt it and I realised he did too so it can't be my imagination.. The best part of my day is always when i meet him online to talk.. But somehow it's hard to describe this too That no matter how far apart we are and that the last time we've seen each other is a month ago.. We've grown and learnt.. so so much. And it.. It's really happening hon.. No matter how far apart, I feel like you're always right beside me all the time.. It's really hard to explain and I sound so incoherent now so.. I will stop here and leave the expressing of feelings to our journal instead. Hahaha. My plans for the next few months Well, i'll update again huh. I'm going to acsi to visit Ivan then my family wants to go fencing then have dinner out. Sorry to make you wait hon, if you're tired pls just go and sleep k. We can always talk tmr cos you've half day.. Read the journal k :)

sexyback

2006-12-26T16:05:00.001+08:00

As promised, here are the updates, though LONG DELAYED. Oh, the title "sexyback" is just to capture attention. It actually means nothing. Hahaha. Prom... As you read shuqi's blog is what i agree with. Was predictable but well organized. The food was good. I chewed an entire chilli padi thanks to my loser self and not wanting to look unglam by spitting it out.. and I would like to extend my heartfeltest and most sincerest thanks to both Nani and Rizki sitting beside me who ordered lots of water for me to drink, and Rizki for feeding me icecubes from his coke :p IT WAS THE MOST TERRIBLE THING I'VE EVER EATEN IN MY ENTIRE LIFE! It was really really spicy I wanted to die! Okay. Aside from that, everyone in my batch in NJ looked SPECTACULAR :) Everyone looks so different with makeup and fancy dresses and suits and jewellery and ties :) I enjoyed dressing up thanks to Tis, my greatest makeup artist who came all the way down to do my makeup for me, and shopping buddy who shopped the day before prom (that's just how last minute i can get..) for my dress and any other stuff. Other than that, i'd actually like envision a party at Sentosa with everyone in any kind of sloppy clothes and going crazy shouting and screaming and all, not having to maintain decorum like during prom. PLUS, if it were at such an atmosphere, I'd have no qualms at all about spitting out the chilli padi. But ohwell, it's over. Though I can't deny it's traumatized me and left a scar on my life.. and my tongue. HAHAHA. Well, perhaps in a couple of years I'll organize a batch reunion at Sentosa this time. No more glamour for me. :) Well, back to the moment. Soon after I barely recovered from that horrible chilli, and was coughing back tears, there came this even more horrible emcee who announced me and Rizki's names. I wasn't paying attention to the programme thanks to the chilli, so I was rather blur, but Rizki pulled me to the stage by then. I was feeling kinda malu on stage but at least Riz was there with me :) This sweetest couple thing which is really lame. HAHAHA. I SOOO wanted to kill the octos cause I knew they nominated us. Rawr. So the rest of prom was more or less a mass phototaking session. May our celluloid smiles be preserved forever :p And the prom queen and king were an interesting show to watch, especially one guy's strip which revealed boobs. Hmmm. I didn't say who did I? :) I was busy trying to picture V.Cheng's reaction. Heh. Mr Tham and Ms Ling Ms Ling is now MRS THAM. :D we crashed her rehearsal- Alvin, Kangwei, Rizki and me. I stood behind her like a stalker but she was too busy to realise :p She was dressed in her usual teaching-clothes at first, but then we followed her to her room where she changed and she looked BEAUTIFUL :) Aww.. I'm so happy for her she got married :) We met Mr Tham, hehe. He has a mustache! Oh my. So he looks kinda scary, but then once he starts talking, I got this impression he's like Ms Ling. Looks scary but actually friendly and not so scary :) Oh, I almost toppled one of the tall crystal vases of flowers, it was really scary! But I managed to catch it before it fell, then I almost fell, but Riz stabilized me before I could do any further damage thanks to my clumsiness. Heh. I kept bugging Ms Ling about her having kids which she avoided the topic like plague, then we laughed at her ringtone WHICH IS HILARIOUS! And so as she was getting her makeup done by a professional makeup artist, we left our card and present and said bye :) CONGRATULATIONS TO MR THAM AND MRS THAM :D May they live in happiness and peace and bliss and I-dunno-what-else-I-can-say-without-sounding-all-cheesy. AFTER PROM... Some went to cocolatte which to some was fun, to some was a rather unpleasant experience, but a new experience nonetheless! Riz and I went to the WWI memorial and sat down to talk about our 3 month separation. We both got really emo, even though we saw it coming since a long long time ago (like in june) But after talking for awhile, we both felt better, so we decided to go back. But then we realised the rest had gone to 7eleven so we decided to look for them :D And we walked in big circles and met locked doors, renovation sites and more locked doors (duh, it was 3 in the morning!) We bumped into random njcians on the way though :) Cheryl, Xiuping, Clemmie, Evelyn, Elaine (and their class), and people from afar we both couldn't see in the dark who kept shouting "Sweetest couple!" Man. So mav and the rest went back first and we made our own way back since we couldn't find each other. We met lots of spider webs, which was a little fascinating cos it was in the middle of open space, and we saw a PERFECTLY ROUND AND BRIGHT MOON right hon? :) Soon, we were back, and we met the Cocolatte people, who were all in the lobby since the lift was under repair. They all looked more energetic than those who stayed around the hotel. Haha. They were sharing experiences with us which was really fun to listen to. Then, Riz and I started on junior's present, which smart enough, we haven't given to them yet due to an oversight on my part. I'm sorry hon.. :( HAHAHA. So, Riz and I kept doing and doing till he got more and more incoherent talking about beetlejuicers and this ghost that is very boliao and keeps bugging me cos no life, and on and on claiming he is 'drunk' on Evian mineral water :) It was nearing 5am.. Tis and Lauren and Mer were there and they kept laughing at us cos we looked kinda antisocial doing the pails while the rest were playing cards :) Hehe.. Kept doing until I fell asleep with my forehead against Rizki's shoulder. Then he woke me up and said we'd better sleep cause there's chalet tomorrow. But then he kept making alot of funny comments and we kept laughing until we couldn't sleep and we were wide awake. Oh man. Plus that awkward moment thanks to Rizki's incoherentness which he denies and says it's due to MY incoherentness. Lol.. So finally fell asleep, agreeing to wake up at 830, but I woke at 7am and started talking to the octos, about all sorts of rubbish and nonsense.. Everyone looked really hilariously tired and incoherent, except Ziheng who still made alot of sense about the GST and income tax. *salutes* HAHA. Samuel was sleeping in a really weird position, his elbow was propping his head up and he looked like the statue of The Thinker. Hahaha. Lots and lots of incoherent talk later.. The Elits were talking at the balcony bout some stuff, and Mav suddenly realised the Esplanade was outside our hotel (omg how slow!) then we were like "Omg so slow!" HAHAHA. The 3 kiddos who somehow fell to my responsibility thanks to one of them being blood related :p were blocking the door, which led to an exercise which involved my classmates tiptoeing, balancing, doing tricky hops while I instructed them. It was like a teambuilding game really, till Lauren woke up from her stupid hangover and laughed madly at us. Grrr. Everyone else but the 3 pigs and Rizki went out for breakfast. So I stayed and waited till 830. Then I woke Rizki up.. helped him fold his clothes (man, i became his maid lah :p) and pack, then he walked me to the Macs the octos were at and he left to go home to get his stuff for chalet :) Again, breakfast with the octos was crazy. Eh, fine.. I'm sorry I shouldn't have talked so much considering everyone was waiting for me to finish my breakfast, but I did anyway. Hahaha. Yingkang's stories were funny. I was quite harsh on him about stuff the octos would know. Heh. Felt pretty bad about it, yet if time rewinded I would have still picked on him about those stuff anyway. Haha. Shuqi fell asleep on the table and then soon we left, some said bye and went on their way, and the rest of us went back to the room. It was only about 10am, so we fell asleep. Me Mich Mav and Xh were squashed on the bed, but we were so sleepy we fell asleep anyways. Nia was sick and she made tea. Kw slept in a tiny couch facing the window (he's so strange) HAHAHA. Just random comments. At 1230, Riz came back to pick me up :) Whoever remained packed the room and checked out, then Riz and I had lunch at Raffles City's BK, then we went to CHALET! CHALET Was a little too unpredictable. Everything was pretty messy, but aside from that, the girls did a great farewell at the end for us :) The food was nice albeit scarce thanks to the guys constantly eating whatever they cook. I had a good nap earlier on despite how noisy the guys were. They were fighting on the bed and Wilbert almost rolled onto me and would have suffocated me (I was on the mattress below) but luckily Rizki kicked him away :) We saw Caden Toh (Coach Collin and Jen's son!) who is SUPER CUTE! Riz insisted we saw him open his eyes before we left.. HAHAHA. It was magical really, a true picture of innocence.. Riz and I kept walking around the entire costa sands cos the room was full of the guys who kept whacking each other and being very violent plus gay. The other seniors came and left within 2 hours :( And the girls went to Macs for a long long time (I wonder why too, duh for the same reason WE left the room) HAHAHA. The guys are so annoying! But at least they were nice enough to give the girls plus us both the beds while they went to play lan the whole night! Crazy! From 1am till like 9am! HAHAHA. Cos when we woke up they just came back. HAHAHA. Finally got a good rest that night :) Next day, Rizki's mom came so he went to meet her, and I went home. Not before the entire cabbing fiasco where all the cabs we called got snatched by other people :( But we finally manage to flag one down, hopefully we're not a cab-snatcher. HAHAHA. And anyway it's the fault of the cab drivers not the people. I don't think I make sense? Maybe incoherent again. *laughs* So we parted after spending 48 hours together which seemed so long yet so short. And it's one of the best 48 hours of my life :) And soon after we had withdrawals symptoms. Hahaha. But we were fine after that. Our last day together before Riz flew off.. It was a rainy but nonetheless wonderful day.. We talked alot, bout our parents and religion and all.. At night, I had dinner at Pepperlunch with da siblings, and Riz joined us :) IT WAS HILARIOUS, cause we filled in the survey with nonsense- under "What food would you recommend added to our menu?" we answered "Free food" And under "Other comments", we commented the uniforms of the waiters aren't too nice. And obviously all this crap was just meant for our own little joke.. But Ivan went to wave- no, more like flail his arms around and the waiter almost came! We were still choking back laughter trying not to attract attention, when Tis went, "Excuse me" to the waiter and passed him the form very solemnly. It was so serious and all, and the rest of us were so in disbelief but started cringing afterward remembering what we wrote! Man. Riz: Was it that guy? (signalling to the waiter walking past our table who looked abit pissed) Me: Yes.. Tis: Ivan can you eat faster.. we're feeling kinda screwed here.. HAHAHAHA. 7th december 2006 This day seemed so long ago.. yet etched deeply in my mind. We had lunch with Dismas, Nia, Bram at Popeyes, which was quite sad for me cause I couldn't understand indon and it's culturally rude to speak english to indons if you're indon within a group of indons. What a tongue twister. Riz translated most stuff for me though. Well, since i'm secretly (not so secret anymore) learning indon, maybe a few years later I'll be able to understand everything :) Hehehe. Me: Eh they said if you sleep from 8-10pm you'll have growth spurt! Dismas: We all stopped growing already.. it's a fact you have to accept lah.. Nia: No we can still grow lah.. Rizki: *laughs* Oh actually she's younger than all of us so she still has chance.. Me: *grins* When i see you all again, i'll be like "Eh dismas!" *looks down to the floor* Dismas: Then i'll say "Eh melissa, come down from the stairs and talk to me lah!" Everyone: *laughs* HAHAHA. After that, Riz wrote me a letter and told me not to peek, so I went to talk to Jojo and Hilda who were sending Nia off! :) We took lotsa pictures, then after that Riz and I went somewhere quieter to talk. It was a super emo moment.. we made our promises, then we went back. Oh! There was a lady who was scrutinizing me with an "who-the-hell-are-you" look and rizki with a "wow-you-look-nice-and-promising" look. Hahaha. If you take your boyfriend for granted do you think anyone will want to sympathize with you? I think only your mom does. So you really should leave my boyfriend alone and stop flooding his inbox, and tell your mom not to glare at me cos it's not too polite. Sorry, just had to vent my frustrations. There was this girl crying really badly when she said bye to her boyfriend.. Jojo and Hilda were scared I'd be like that, so they were watching me with this cautious look. Hehe. (I knew okay, you two!) We said bye, and he disappeared for the last time in 3 months.. Well, it could have ended like that, the usual drama. But noooo. I just realised my handphone was in his pocket (omg right? say 'mel's a loser' ten times') and he had to request the guard to let him cross the 'border' again to pass it to me. The guard at my side refused to let him thru at first, so when I took the handphone I was scared they were gonna shoot him, but they didn't luckily. Hahaha. We were laughing cos of the loserishness, despite how sad we were. Yup. And there you can insert the cliche disappearance of his backview into the rest of the Terminal.. I contained myself cos I told myself to be strong since this is only the start. Jojo and Hilda were so nice they walked me to the taxi stand which was so far away.. (Thanks! (: ) Then I cabbed home with the money Riz passed me (he insisted I cab home cos he knew I'd be emo).. called and said goodbye.. Then I opened up the letter and read it. Teared abit cos it was really touching and sincere.. The continuation would be the europe trip and christmas, which I'm too lazy to continue right now. Hahaha. Later folks :)

merry christmas eve

2006-12-24T15:18:00.000+08:00

everytime i go to town and i see couples around.. i think of us. and a shocking observation, is that most of them are just kissing or doing some form of public displays of affection.. which i'm not condemning, just that - THAT'S ALL THEY DO! seriously. I can be standing behind a couple for 10 minutes in a queue and that's really all they do! and there's even couples who hold hands but i don't see them talking a word the entire time! And their faces is like.. so sian and all.. like the fact that the person they love most being right next to them means nothing! if i could tell them something.. i'd tell them the person i love most is thousands of miles away.. and that i miss him terribly much.. and that they should cherish every single second with the person next to them.. say everything they want to say because they can.. because although i talk to him everyday online.. although we blog in the journal.. there's never enough time there's so many things i want to talk to him about.. it's not the same telling him about a funny incident through msn.. so, all of you should treasure every moment you have right now with that person most special to you.. but i can't tell them that can i.. oh well.. merry christmas eve to you hon :) and a very merry christmas eve to all =) i'm guilty of procrastinating so christmas cards will either be late or passed to you during a christmas party i'm seeing you at. this is to all i'm writing a christmas card to :) at least i'm not as bad as xiaohui k! :p that's something we both definitely agree on says: cuz it's really happening.. it really is =)

a christmas in march :)

2006-12-24T03:09:00.000+08:00

I am feeling so warm and fuzzy right now.. It didn't seem possible at all.. But what I wanted so badly is going to come true.. And it's all thanks to you hon.. Since it's Christmas eve, and I'm feeling all warm and fuzzy. After the eyesore of a post my previous entry, I'm going to post a finally heartwarming one. To explain my ambiguous entry about what I wanted so badly.. all i want for christmas is... says: since we don't keep anything from each other all i want for christmas is... says: it's really silly.. all i want for christmas is... says: you sure you wanna know? that's something we both definitely agree on says: yup all i want for christmas is... says: you know christmas has been the most important time of the year for me every year.. all i want for christmas is... says: even though im not christian.. all i want for christmas is... says: it's a season of love and goodwill.. all i want for christmas is... says: it means so much to me.. all i want for christmas is... says: even more than my own birthday all i want for christmas is... says: or new years all i want for christmas is... says: it means so much to me not cos of the presents only.. all i want for christmas is... says: or the fantastic food.. all i want for christmas is... says: but cos of my family.. all i want for christmas is... says: cos they're the ones i love most.. all i want for christmas is... says: and we get to spend time together and it usually goes perfect all i want for christmas is... says: cos on christmas nobody gets mad at each other all i want for christmas is... says: or tries not to all i want for christmas is... says: it's kinda magical all i want for christmas is... says: i really wish you were here hon.. after some talking.. that's something we both definitely agree on says: I asked if they sell christmas trees if it's not christmas season all i want for christmas is... says: hmm i'm not sure hon.. all i want for christmas is... says: why? that's something we both definitely agree on says: is it possible to borrow your family's one? all i want for christmas is... says: i think so.. all i want for christmas is... says: why hon.. that's something we both definitely agree on says: I wanna make it up to you.. that's something we both definitely agree on says: we'll have our own christmas when I get back that's something we both definitely agree on says: just the 2 of us all i want for christmas is... says: hon.. all i want for christmas is... says: you are so sweet.. that's something we both definitely agree on says: is it ok if it's not celebrated on that day? all i want for christmas is... says: yup it's ok hon.. that's something we both definitely agree on says: ok that's something we both definitely agree on says: we'll decorate the tree together that's something we both definitely agree on says: and exchange gifts k.. all i want for christmas is... says: ok hon.. all i want for christmas is... says: oh wow.. you are the best hon.. =) Sometimes, things like this make me believe that nothing is impossible... Well. I love you so much :) A very Merry Christmas eve to all :) Spread the love okay? Xh, thanks for bringing me to church. I really really appreciate it k. And I really appreciate your support especially =)

ASSHOLE

2006-12-23T02:23:00.000+08:00

Octos Christmas Party at my place 27th dec says: and i appreciate your concern, but please don't make sarcast comments abt rizki to me k Gehry is Roark says: actually it was directed at you Octos Christmas Party at my place 27th dec says: which? Octos Christmas Party at my place 27th dec says: i was talking about your comment about me not being a strict enough muslim Gehry is Roark says: wtf u crazy you think thats sarcastic? Octos Christmas Party at my place 27th dec says: yes it is because i'm not even a muslim Gehry is Roark says: u want to see me sarcastic? Gehry is Roark says: no you dont want to see me sarcastic Octos Christmas Party at my place 27th dec says: i don't owe it to tell you this Octos Christmas Party at my place 27th dec says: but everytime we talk online or on the phone or sms, rizki knows Octos Christmas Party at my place 27th dec says: i tell him everything Octos Christmas Party at my place 27th dec says: and so does he Octos Christmas Party at my place 27th dec says: whatever you wanted to imply What an ass. In case you don't remember, you started talking to me first And whatever it is, I'll tell Rizki I talked to you once he can come online Don't you dare DON'T YOU DARE for a moment think i'm like your 3rd girlfriend, or 4th girlfriend or whatever COS I'M NOT. I'm nowhere like her And if you must know I really have no respect for people like that So pls grow up If you decide you can be matured enough to be FRIENDS with me and stop insulting me you can talk to me other than that, forget it.

Here it is

2006-12-22T23:09:00.000+08:00

I never wanted anything so bad before.. But I want this so bad it's taking over me.. my mind, my heart, my soul.. even my dreams. I'm aching for it, I'm hurting for it, I'm praying for it.. No i'm not talking about sex. (incase you're onetrack minded) And it's not something you can give me for Christmas.

To Rizki

2006-12-22T11:12:00.000+08:00

This is to Riz: (since he can't open our shared journal somehow :( ) Hon, the funniest thing just happened. My whole family overslept and we just woke up =) (it's 11am now) Guess I got enough rest afterall... HAHAHAH. But I don't think I'll be online till maybe later in the afternoon cos i'll go straight for lunch with dory. Just to let you know. Take care of your dad.. Lots of love, Mel.

2006-12-21T11:31:00.000+08:00

ARGH! I've so many things to blog about! But no mood to blog now. I need to blog about the long delayed prom, octos stayover, softball chalet... AND MY TRIP TO SWITZERLAND FRANCE PARIS AND LONDON! OMG I miss london! Went to the temple with my family this morning.. that stupid my dragon horoscope being in conflict with some other horoscope this year thus i need to pray or be cursed. I prayed at the start of the year supposedly to remove the curse, then now is to thank the gods for protecting me. Let me clarify, it is something which I don't believe in but am forced to go- shall elaborate more later. I feel alot better than last night. Was abit fluish (strange, i thought flu jabs are supposed to prevent flu..) and had a real bad headache. Really exhausted with jetlag too! Ivan's collecting his school posting results now! I wonder what school he's posted to... It was so improper, tis ivan and I laughing like crazy at the temple.. Heh. At least it was on the outdoor grounds not inside the temple itself. We were recapping ivan's childhood change till now. Heehee. Everytime ivan does something irritating, we always grit our teeth and go "child growth! child growth!" HAHAHAHA. damn funny. Although I wanted you to leave me alone, strangely enough, when I got a message just now.. I was found myself hoping it was you.. But it was just remy regarding a job offer.. =(